Through My Eyes
by Poxy Kirkman
Summary: Hanna is a young patron of the Host Club. A girl who proves that appearances aren't always what they seem, and as pretend walls come tumbling down she is forced to take off her happy mask... will the guys help her, or will she be left behind in the dust? HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

Hey, so it's been a while, and I'm posting this story so... yeah :)

I have to thank my friend Cat or... I Found Nemo (I think) for the whole idea, and the name for the one shot.

For brief description, this is basically an Ouran story from one of the guests perspectives, where she's all obsessive and stuff... so... ENJOY!

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"Your smile alone brightens my day... it is like the light at the end of the tunnel, but even heaven is pale in comparison to your radiance."

I shivered as he whispered those words, those sweet nothings, into my ear. I knew that was what they were worth... nothing... but it didn't stop my heart fluttering when he smiled at me. Didn't stop my breath catching in my throat when he pulled me close. Didn't stop me wanting him every time he spoke to me.

I pulled myself together enough to whisper his name;

"Tamaki..."

And that elicited a small smile from him, his violet eyes twinkling as he smirked (but not unkindly) and pulled away from me, bowing slightly before he departed to tend to the rest of the girls in the room who felt exactly the same as me, and he knew he made them all feel that way. He gained pleasure and confidence from it, while we all felt a little depressed when we watched him treating another girl to his wondrously enchanting words... most likely the same he's used on us some time or another.

But he was the image of perfection, was he not? Those shining gold locks, framing his face. He was the perfect height too, as you could easily hold onto him, and feel his heart beating beneath his ribs, and you knew then he wasn't some elaborate hallucination that your mind had made. His eyes... my God, his eyes... never had I seen eyes like his, their colour was just unique and reflected the uniqueness of his persona. He was literally, one of a kind.

And as I watched him waltz with another girl, spinning her and smiling, I caught his eye. Still standing where he'd left me, still looking at him, longingly. He smiled again, a special one for me, even when he was with another girl. I felt happiness swell in my chest, and I was content then to turn away from him, only to turn right to Kyouya, who's hand retracted quickly.

It was almost like he'd been reaching out to check on me.

How sweet.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his face melting into a cool, pleasant smile.

"I am, thank you."

He grinned, and offered me his arm, while I happily took, and he escorted me back to a table where only he was sat.

I, unlike most guests, didn't have a favourite, or a preferred host. I was happy to receive attention from any of them, and moments like this, mostly with Kyouya, were the best. The only flaw with hanging around Tamaki was the fact that he had about two dozen girls to tend to at once. Half of them weren't even there to see him, but he drew them in like moths to a flame... a rather attractive flame... and he couldn't stay with one girl for more than thirty seconds, or else the rest of them get jealous.

So being with Kyouya was a rare treat.

And like the gentleman he is, he offered me some tea, and he kept smiling throughout the process of fetching a cup and saucer and pouring the tea into a cup.

"You looked a little lost before Hanna, are you okay?" he asked politely, looking at me from over his own cup.

"I was just thinking, I'm quite all right." I replied, smiling slightly to myself when his glasses fogged over due to the steam from the cup.

He promptly put his cup down and pulled out a handkerchief, and pulled off his glasses. For the moment it took him to wipe his glasses clean, I felt like screaming with joy. He looked handsome anyway, but without his glasses you could clearly see his onyx eyes, and try, as hard and impossible as it was, to see farther into them, as I heard that the eyes are the doorways to the soul.

Perhaps not for Kyouya. He had an amazing poker face. And he was awfully difficult to try and read, even at the best of times.

And when he replaced his glasses, I had to slowly and carefully calm myself down, though I felt like bursting at the seams.

He then smiled knowingly, like he knew (and he probably did) that I was suppressing my emotions, and he went to take another sip of tea, only for his glasses to fog up again.

"you'd have thought I would have learned by now..." he said, pulling off his glasses again, but this time folding them up, and placing them on the table. I stared in shock, as this meant he was leaving them up, and I could see into his eyes...

He noticed the look on my face, and started to chuckle, which made me emit a high falsetto sounding giggle, highly unlike me, and I promptly clapped a hand over my mouth to stop the noise. Which in turn made him chuckle some more, and I turned bright red in the effort it took not to cry out in complete and utter happiness.

And when I managed to regain composure, we begun a conversation, which, by all standards, was quite intimate and deep for Kyouya. He asked about my school work, and how I liked club, but then he moved onto asking about family and how my fathers business was.

I knew it wasn't purely niceties, as even among his hard core fangirls he was known to be rather work orientated. If he thought you were the key to getting up the social ladder, he saw you as nothing more than that next step, and he used you as such.

His charming good looks and killer smile kind of helped ease the pain when he back stabbed you, I suppose.

But then of course he had to politely leave me where I was, as he had paperwork, guests and other club 'things' to sort out.

And I politely let him go about his business, as who was I to tell him not to leave me... it was unladylike to beg him to stay, so I could enjoy his attention, so what else could I do? I watched him go, then noticed he'd conveniently left behind his little black book...

He marked the pages with a black ribbon that was attached to the book, and looked around before reaching out and sliding the book towards me. I slipped through it, looking at all the notes he'd made about costs and such, until I reached the marked page.

It was notes on me.

'Hanna Konni, 17, class 2-A, no host preference...'

The list went on, and I felt kind of disturbed about how much he knew about me. I read on.

'Polite, friendly, sociable, is no trouble in clubs, regular customer – high priority.'

I heard someone come up behind me, so I hastily snapped the book shut and flung it back onto the table. It landed a good few inches away from where it was originally, and it was propped up on it's side like a tiny tent. I flushed as I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I didn't dare to turn around. Then I felt another hand on my other shoulder, and suddenly cold air was being blown into my ears, and I gave a short shriek before leaping up.

"Don't hurt yourself!" two voices laughed, and I turned to see the twins, Hikaru and Kaoru.

"Please don't do that." I huffed, started to walk away.

"Or what?" They asked, grinning cheekily.

"Nothing. I won't do anything."

"That" said one of them (Hikaru, I was sure) "Is not a good enough reason for me to stop."

"I'm asking nicely..." I mumbled, backing off further still.

"Hm.. nope." he laughed, then jumped at me, and started tickling me, and then his twin (Kaoru, it had to be... I think) joined in, poking me in the sides and making me double up with tears in my eyes, laughing, but trying to push them off too.

Then Kaoru yelled 'ouch' and in a second Hikaru had stopped. He swept Kaoru into a tight hug, and was fussing over him, their faces inches from one another, holding each other, whispering things that girls in here could only imagine.

Their twincest act. Most girls swooned over it, but for me, it wasn't my favourite thing to watch. The idea of brothers, twin brothers, in love was somewhat disturbing, it just wasn't natural. I suppose the thing that comforted me and allowed me to be around them without cringing too much was the fact that I knew it was just an act. Indeed, they were closer than most twins, but it wasn't like they were going to sleep together... at least not like that.

They looked at me.

"Why doesn't this work on you?" they asked, quite bluntly. I shrugged in response.

"It's all just an act isn't it? I'm not bothered by it."

They stared at me, gawking, then started to laugh.

"Well, we'll have to try harder!" Hikaru said, before grabbing my hand and pulling me close, then dipping me low and pressing his lips to my cheek. I was in utter shock at first, and barely registered the fact that he'd lifted me up and span me into Kaoru's arm, who playfully nipped my ear.

They then pranced off, not forgetting to shoot their Cheshire cat smiles back at me.

I was blushing furiously, and trying to avoid the glares of Hikaru and Kaoru's die hard fangirls. So I made my escape by wandering to one of the sofas where there was a larger crowd of people, so it would be less likely I would be picked out or treated differently.

I got there, and was surprised to see Mori throwing Honey in the air, then catching him again. It wasn't like what people did with babies, to make them laugh; Mori threw Honey about twenty feet into the air, Honey flipped and posed and laughed, then Mori caught him again when he came down.

Girls around me were cheering and laughing, while Haruhi was on my right looking more worried than I thought anyone possibly could.

"Are you okay Haruhi?" I asked.

"I... I- yeah, I am. I just one want them hurting themselves" she replied.

Yes, she.

It was a well known fact that Haruhi was female. Some people were in denial (her customers for one) and still stuck to their guns that she was a he, but I don't see what the big deal was.

"They'll be fine." I said, trying to be reassuring. That's when I saw that Honey had gone off balance, and was hurtling towards me and Haruhi. Other girls had scattered, but Haruhi was rooted to the spot, and though I wanted to run, my legs felt like lead. I couldn't move an inch, and I got ready to be bruised...

But then nothing happened, and I felt arms wrapping around my neck.

"Hanna-chan, Hanna-chan! Are you okay?" Honey cried, hugging me tight. People were fussing over me and Haruhi, while Mori looked on worriedly.

"I'm fine, honestly, I'm fine!" I cried, blushing madly while Honey continued hugging me.

"You sure?" Mori spoke up, his voice seemingly reverberating around my head, making me feel dizzy.

I nodded mutely, and then tried to prise honey off me. He looked at me, his chocolate eyes shining as he smiled at me then.

"Okay Hanna, as long as I didn't hurt you." He leapt away from me, and launched himself onto Mori's shoulders. They both continued playing around, Mori looking more protective than usual, and not throwing Honey as high as he was before, and staying farther away from the guests.

I, honestly, am a self proclaimed fangirl of things cute, anime, and date sim. Maybe not to the extent Renge is, but I still find games fun and entertaining, and animes to be full of things to go gaga over. But these boys (and the girl) are so fun, and entertaining, and handsome, and... and so much more! I know being obsessed with them is something not to be proud of, it's something weird, and abnormal, because you shouldn't like a guy off how he treats you in a club... which ultimately is like a game to them.

But I can't stop myself from swooning over Tamaki's good looks and charming words, from smiling a little more when Kyouya sits down with me alone and takes the time out to talk to me. I can't help it if I love hanging around with the twins, because they're more fun then anyone else I know, or if I feel my heart flutter with excitement when I'm watching Mori and Honey. Even spending time with Haruhi and having a relatively girly conversation with her before Tamaki goes onto protective mode where he feels the need to try and hide her gender.

I, like many of the girls I see around me, have fallen into the trap that is the Host Club, though enjoyable as it is, it was just a way to lure in pretty girls who would willingly fawn over.

Then as club neared the end, and everyone filed out, I hung behind.

When I thought the room was empty enough, I slowly made my way to tapped him on the shoulder.

"Kyouya, could I have a word please?" I asked quietly, but still managed to grab the attention of the other hosts.

"Of course, would you like to sit down?" he asked, gesturing to the table to our right.

"Um, no, I'd rather not" I replied, hoping I could get this over with, like ripping off a plaster.

"Okay then..." he said quietly.

"Princess, what's wrong?" Tamaki asked, looking agitated.

"Hanna-chan?"

I took a breath. If I didn't do it now, I'd have another year of day dreaming, not reaching my target grades, longing to talk to the same six guys and isolating myself from other guys because they don't quite measure up to those that I see daily...

"I'd like to quit the Host Club."


	2. Chapter 2

I hit a funk with my other story, my dreaded theequal, so I decided to scrap it, sod the idea, and hey presto! Ideas for this start falling out my head.

So, I am carrying this on, because a few people said it would be good to know of reactions, and I have another 6 chapters planned out, as well as an idea for a whole bloomin story! WOW! Things happen for a reason :)

So yeah, we should thank Aurora-16 and my friend Cat for this, because without either I would not have these ideas! Brilliant, we love them

That is all

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There was complete and utter stunned silence, then after a moment Kyouya cleared his throat.

"Quit?" he asked, making me flush.

I realised that the way I'd phrased it made it sound like I was addicted. I kind of was, but I didn't need them to know that, did I?

"Yes… Um, I'd like to leave" I said, basically repeating my first statement but rephrasing it.

"But… you can't!" Tamaki cried, throwing himself on me and startling me. I lost my balance and fell into a table, onto the floor and ended up with tears in my eyes from the pain in my side, and non other than Tamaki basically straddling me.

I felt my chest swell, and the small squealing voice in the back of my head that was kicking and screaming at me for saying I wanted to quit was asking me how many other girls had he done this to.

I couldn't talk, and thankfully someone had some sense to pull him off me before I imploded.

"See, there's the reason she wants to leave! You practically just molested her!" the twins yelled, prodding Tamaki, who was stuttering and stammering apologies.

"No, no that's not it" I squeaked, holding my hand up at the twins, imploring them to stop.

"Will you all just pack it in and go? I'd like to have a word with Hanna" Kyouya snapped, glaring down the twins until they dragged Tamaki away into a corner of the room, with Mori, Honey and Haruhi following behind.

I heard Kyouya cough, and when I looked around he was pulling out a chair for me to sit in. I felt my face go even more red, and I felt dizzy too. It shouldn't be this hard.

"I- couldn't we do this tomorrow Kyouya? I need to go home" I said quietly, pushing myself up from the floor and walking towards him slowly.

"It won't talk long Hanna, I promise" he said, smiling slightly; but there was something more foreboding about this smile. It seemed almost evil, and I felt my stomach twist.

"Okay" I whispered, sitting in the seat he was offering me. He sat opposite, and pushed his glasses up slightly.

"So…" he started, flicking through his book "you want to leave?"

"Yes."

"Are you entirely sure?"

"Yes."

He nodded for a moment, jotting something down. I felt as if I were being interrogated. Part of me was frightened, absolutely downright terrified of the man in front of me. But there was a thrill going up my spine and I kept holding my breath between every answer.

"And why do you want to leave?"

I went to talk, but my whole vocabulary seemed to disintegrate between my thought processes and my mouth, and I sat there looking stupid, gaping like a fish.

"Hanna?" he asked, looking slightly more concerned as I didn't talk.

Why did I want to leave? My grades weren't terrible! I had friends here within the groups and it's not like I spent EVERY waking moment thinking of them. This was something to look forward to throughout the day and it would always cheer me up.

They may not have exclusive feelings for me, but the hosts here cared about me a little, surely.

I glanced around to see a nervous looking Honey, a concerned Mori… unbothered twins… and Tamaki and Haruhi who looked equally apprehensive as the other.

Looking back to Kyouya, whose brow was furrowed and who was leaning slightly forward, as if to see if I was alright.

Something in me snapped, and tears spring to my eyes.

Who was I kidding? This is a business! They don't care!

Why did I want to leave?

"Just because" I cried, standing suddenly, grabbing my bag and running out as quickly as I could, ignoring them all shouting my name, and the footsteps that echoed my own as I pounded down the halls. I didn't care that someone was following me. I just wanted out.


	3. Chapter 3

Hi, so thank you everyone for the reviews, Hanna appreciates them too :) Hope you enjoy this chapter too, though it's more or less just a filler, and only 262 words if you ignore the A/N I'm writing now... so yeah... Reviews are more than welcome, and constructive criticism also, though no flames please.

Thanks again :)

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I sat at home brushing my hair through, and I chanced a look in the mirror, which I did quite often nowadays. I felt like I had to check I was still there, looking the same. It was strange.

And per usual, I saw a pale young girl staring back, with long silky black hair and bright green eyes. I wasn't the usual Japanese girl; I look a sight different than most girls around here with grey, brown and black eyes.

I get told on a daily basis that I am beautiful, that I have an amazing figure and personality and I'm a wonderful person.

But I feel so ugly within myself. I feel like a horrible person – vain, conceited, rude… all because of my experiences within that one daft club.

The Host Club.

It wasn't really the club itself; the idea of the Host Club was for people to go in and socialise, be pampered, and generally have a good time. But I think somewhere along the way people turned it into a popularity contest. People squabbled about which host they were to see, who was such a bodies biggest fan, who had been told the nicest things, who had had more fun…

It was stupid. I wanted no part in that part of the club. I wanted nothing to do with the girls that went there.

They always put me down, and to make myself feel better, I'd turn right around and have a go at them. I feel like a horrible person now, and though when I look in the mirror and see someone beautiful, I feel as if it's just a mask for the bitch that's inside…


	4. Chapter 4

I'm having a wee bit of trouble with the whole edit/preview document thing, so I massively apologize if this chapter is messed up. If it is though, I will take it down and re-do the whole thing. Ya never know, it might just be my laptop rebelling against FanFiction. I'm currently in love with Ed Sheeran. Thought I'd tell you for the jollies :)

"So… the square root of x – 34 is…" I started, muttering to myself, then my phone buzzed next to me.

I scraped the hair out of my face and picked up my phone, resting my chin on my arm while I opened my texts.

It was from Kyouya, and it read:

'Just wanted to make sure you were okay after today. I would like to talk to you tomorrow, during lunch time – Kyouya'

Sighing, I dropped my face to my desk, and sighed. Though my nose hurt a hell of a lot now, I could care less.

My heart did a little flip though, and I couldn't help but bite my lip as I smiled. Kyouya knew my number, and because he'd text me, I now knew his. I wriggled about in my seat to stop myself jumping up and dancing at the idea of him lounging about at his home, perhaps just out of the shower (topless!) with his glasses sliding down his nose, his dark eyes lit up from the light from his phone...

I squeezed my eyes shut tight, and tried to get this image out of my mind. It didn't work, it only made the image more prominent, as if it had been burned into the back of my eyelids. I pictured him holding my hand and leading me around the room like he did earlier today, smiling politely as he fetched me a cup of tea and talking to me for a long time. Then I snapped my eyes wide open and shook myself mentally. I'd quit the Host Club! I couldn't think like this, and Kyouya wanted to meet tomorrow…

If I thought today was a disaster, then tomorrow would be world war three.

X X X

I had considered calling in sick today, but I knew I couldn't avoid Kyouya forever, or else my grades would drop and my father would be angry with me.

Twelve o'clock seemed to take ages to come around, and what scared me most was the Kyouya and Tamaki were in my science class, which was just before noon. So it wasn't even like I could escape from the situation.

When they came in, I felt the urge to run at Tamaki and beg him to let me back into the club. I caught myself a moment after this thought entered my mind, surprised and embarrassed to find myself stood up, so I tried to conceal it by rearranging my skirt and sitting back down, trying to settle myself and my stomach, which was crying out at me.

I couldn't help myself though, and through the lesson I kept shooting glances over at Kyouya and Tamaki, who sat together at their workbench. Kyouya, every now and then, would turn his head slightly, and the light would glance of his glasses and though I couldn't see his eyes, I knew he was looking at me, and I felt like crying because it was almost as if he were analysing me.

Worst of all, Tamaki kept donning large, sad puppy dog eyes. His violet eyes twinkled, and I had to bit my lip to stop my heart shooting out of my chest in a mix of happiness and guilt. He kept looking at me. It made me feel special, but also desperate. I never thought I'd long for his attention this much, but apparently I did.

I felt like crying. Why did I ever make this choice? Why did I even say I wanted to leave the club, when I so obviously didn't? I turned away from the pair of them and forced my head down, telling myself to get a grip and ignore them. I didn't have to look at a pair of amazingly handsome guys.

Amazingly, though I felt as though I hadn't managed to retain any information about neutrinos, I had made sufficient notes to revise from later on.

As I expected, once the bell had rung to signify classes ending, no sooner had I packed my bag and stood up was Kyouya stood before me smiling politely, with a beaming Tamaki by his side, who looked considerably happier with me.

"Hello princess!" Tamaki beamed, taking my hand and kissing it lightly, making me flush red. He gave a coy smile before pulling me closer to him. Close enough to feel his warmth, but not too close to make it look something other than just a friendly hug. "Are you really sure we can't convince you to come to club today? I'll treat you like my queen?"

My heart started racing as he spoke, and I had to force my eyes shut to block out his smile. But like my… image… of Kyouya last night, his beautiful face seemed to be sketched in my minds eyes, and I couldn't get Tamaki out of my mind. I took a breath to try and regain some dignity, but I just inhaled his cologne and it made me feel dizzy.

"I'm sure" I breathed, and when I felt him let go of my hand I dared to open my eyes and take a shaking step away from him.

He was frowning slightly, but he seemed to recover and the corned of his mouth rose a little.

"Well… okay then. I'll see you soon though Hanna."

He walked away, leaving me with Kyouya. It took me a moment to get over the way he said my voice, and I realised I was slightly star struck. I looked up shyly at the black haired, bespectacled boy, and started chewing on the inside of my lip nervously.

"Should we go to a more private place?" he asked, the light glinting off his glasses again as he put one hand gently on the square of my back to steer me, while his other arm gestured forward.

"Sure" I agreed, letting him guide me to a smaller room that was just down the corridor. I felt that familiar thrill go through my spine. My God, he was touching me… and Tamaki kissed my hand. It was like they had planned this.

Before I knew it we were in a smaller room, and he shut the door behind us and gestured towards a seat. I sat down quietly, and instead of sitting across from me, he sat at ninety degrees from me, which seemed slightly friendlier and made me ease up a little.

"Are you okay Hanna?" he asked, taking his glasses off to clean them, so I felt giddy with happiness again.

"Yes, yes I'm fine" I said after a moment to recompose myself.

"So, I want you to tell me why you want to leave. If you don't want to, that's fine, but we will need you to do some things for us if you are sure you're leaving our company."

I looked up at him. For a second, I thought the way he said company made it sound very business like, and very official. Then I realised he meant leaving their club and the company they provided me, and I nodded slightly to myself.

"Like what?" I asked, and he replied with a throaty chuckle.

"Basically, just to keep what happens in Host Club a secret. It adds to the illusion and the appeal."

"Oh, okay, I can do that."

He nodded, smiling, and then cleared his throat.

"So, would you like to tell me why you want to leave?"

I hung my head and blushed, then nodded slightly.

"Basically, all my grades are slipping because I spend a… a bit too much time in club. And I- well, some of the other girls aren't very nice." I muttered, and I noticed his brow furrow right away.

"As in?" he asked, encouraging me to continue.

"Well…" I started, rubbing my temple and thinking about how best to phrase it. "It's turning into a bit of a competition… who can get the host to pay more attention to them. It gets pretty nasty. I… Some people can be really mean, and I react to it-"

"Like anyone would" he agreed, nodding, to make me feel less guilty about it.

"Yeah, so I react to it, and I feel like I'm turning into a bit of a… well, I'm being a spiteful…"

"I know what you mean" he cut me off, nodding reassuringly.

"It's like I'm losing myself" I added quietly, and he nodded.

"Well… Hanna, it can all be sorted out… quite easily I might add."

I looked up.

"Well, you're already a very intelligent young woman" I smiled, and though I knew he was baiting me back into the club, I couldn't help but feel flattered. "But if you do feel like you're slipping in class, we can make appointments for you in club time, one on one, for us to help you. We're not a stupid bunch of men, you know?"

"No, I know-"

"If it's really a problem, then I do feel somewhat responsible, because the Host Club shouldn't be making you feel bad about yourself, and it shouldn't be a distraction from your schoolwork."

"It's not the Host Club making me feel bad, it's what's happening within it- with other people" I said, trying to get my point across.

"Okay, I understand" he nodded "and I, and the other hosts, will address that issue, I promise."

"Okay…"

"In the meantime, would you like to keep coming to club?" he asked, getting right back to the point… business at the end of the day.

I took a deep breath, and shook my head.

"No, not until I've gotten my grades up slightly. Then… then maybe I will to get some help getting them back to A's."

He nodded again, before standing up and picking both of our bags up, handing mine to me in a gentlemanly fashion. He chuckled slightly, and looked at me with a new spark in his eyes.

"You know, you're not the first whose said they'll leave the Host Club… will power tends to wear out after a few days. You think you'll manage?"

I nodded, because I knew if I opened my mouth I would blurt out 'no'.

"Hanna Konni, you're a terrible liar" he laughed, seeing right through me. Then he turned around and left me on my own.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 :D Hope ya'll enjoy it, um, and please review. Constructive criticism is very much welcome, and other reviews. Thanks x -

Part of me felt queasy.

The way he'd asked if I'd be able to hold out, and the way he laughed… not vindictively, but definitely not in the friendliest of ways either… it was almost as if he was saying he wasn't going to lose. Like this was a game or something like that.

I'd skulked away to a room that was rarely in use in the school, that a lot of 'social rejects' went to at lunch and ate alone. I'd just pulled out my math book when I saw a familiar figure walk through the door, and my heart sank to my toes.

"Hi Haruhi" I said weakly, raising my hand and managing a small wave. She smiled and came over to sit next to me.

"Hi Hanna, I haven't seen you in here before" she said, opening her lunch box and pulling out a sandwich, biting into it.

"Yes… well I decided I should pay more attention to my studies" I smiled slightly, pointing towards my book.

"Yeah, it's a good idea. I'm a little behind too…" she said, sighing and flicking her hair out of her face.

I nodded and chewed my lip, thinking of something to say. It felt awkward, and there most definitely was an elephant in the room. I decided to get it over with, and leaning closer to her, I said quietly;

"Why do you pretend to be a guy?"

She stopped moving her hair mid action, and looked stunned, then she recovered slightly and gave a nervous giggle.

"You, um, how did you-?"

"A lot of people know, they just don't mention it" I smiled, picking up my pen and chewing on the end "and some people are in denial, so… yeah"

"So… everyone knows?"

"Every guest, more or less, but only because they pay more attention to you" I noted, looking at the first math problem which was asking me to convert the square of pie into the tenth division. I'm not even sure what that meant.

"Okay…" Haruhi said slowly, nodding. "I better tell Kyouya."

"I think he knows, he probably doesn't mention it." I pointed out, surprised I could talk about him so easily when he wasn't there. She agreed quietly.

We both sank into a silence that didn't feel awkward at all, and we both got on with our work while eating lunch. I think it was because I'd got that topic out of the way. I ignored the fact that she hadn't answered my question as to why she pretended she was male, but I suppose I took her a little by surprise. She did seem to be musing over it.

But it felt good that I wasn't completely awkward around her, though I suppose it was because I knew she was a girl and I didn't feel as if I actually had a connection with her. Out of all the hosts, she was the one I least talked to, and we hardly ever saw one another.

We carried on in a comfortable silence, and when the warning bell rung that told us class was about to start, we packed up and said goodbye and smiled politely.

I felt a lot happier about myself then, and for the first time in a few weeks, I managed to hand my work in to my maths teacher, and not having to come up with some stupid excuse as to why I hadn't done it.

I ignored Tamaki for the majority of the lesson, not sitting gawking at him like some lovesick puppy. I spoke to him only when I needed to, and I think my good mood wore off on him, because he didn't seem too bothered by it either. Though he was close to me, so much so that every now and then he'd rest his arm on top of mine, and when I looked at him, he smiled cheekily. I felt myself blush, but I tried to ignore how much I wanted to hug him now and forced myself to try and concentrate; which worked about as well as this idea to quit the club.

But I did survive the lesson, and I didn't fling myself into his arms and press my head against his chest, like I wanted to so badly.

It was only when I got to the main entrance (and exit) to the school that I faltered in my newfound will power.

There were a couple of girls stood there, smirking nastily at me. They were from the Host Club, and they were some of the twins regulars. The ones that had glared so harshly at me when the twins had twirled me around playfully yesterday.

I tried to ignore them and keep moving, but one of them stuck their leg out in front of me and I didn't have time to hop over it, so I tripped and landed face first on the marble tile.

"Walk much?" one of the girls jeered, and I sat up and touched my lip gingerly, to find it was bleeding.

"God, what a klutz!" another laughed.

I picked myself up and tried to retain my dignity, but tears were springing to my eyes, no matter how hard I tried to blink them away, and when I bent to pick up my bag and the books that had fallen out of it, they just shoved them back out of my arms.

"Stay away from Hikaru and Kaoru" one of them hissed, prodding me in my chest.

"You can stay away from them too" a voice said, and it reverberated around the hall, silencing everyone. We all looked to see Mori standing there, looking aggravated.

The girls gave a gasp and leapt away from me, stammering for an excuse.

"Drop it" Mori snarled, as Honey bounded up out of nowhere, grabbed my wrist and pulled me down to his height.

"Aw, Hanna-chan, you're hurt" he mumbled, gently touching a tissue to my lip. His big brown eyes were level with mine, and I wanted to hug him close to me, he was so adorable…

"It's ok" I replied, going red. I looked back up to Mori to see what he was doing, and he was currently glowering at the girls. It was a look I'd never seen him give, and it was full of contempt. It was scary.

"You're banned from the Host Club. Don't bother showing your faces again" he snapped, and turned his backs on them to look at me.

"Are you okay?" he asked, and it surprised me to hear how quiet and gentle his voice had gone. His grey eyes were narrowed, and he gave me a sweeping look, as if checking for any external injuries, before looking right into my eyes and holding that gaze. I felt mesmerised, but I shook my head slightly then nodded, pulling myself out of that stupid trance.

"Yeah, fine" I said, flushing, and looking past him to see the group of girls close to tears. "But I- I have to go" I said quickly, backing away from the pair, pressing the tissue to my mouth and rushing away.


	6. Chapter 6

Just a little chapter, because I'm still writing, and OMGEEEZ! I have a job interview with Debenhams tomorrow. It's like a big retail store for those of you that aren't in the UK and have no concept of what it is. It's quite cool, and I'm hoping the three interviews I've already had this month have prepared me for this :/ apparently I'm a great candidate for a job, but I need more experience... which I'll never get if I don't get a job... so yeah, I find that being jobless sucks. I haz no moniez! Hoping you enjoy this chapter anyway. It's not amazing, but yeah... :) -

"Stupid Hanna! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" I cried, hitting my head into my wardrobe.

It was horrible to admit, but I'd been missing the Host Club. Hikaru and Kaoru bullying me, teasing me and having fun with me. Honey being cute and hugging me whenever I'd walked in after failing a test, sitting me down with his bun-bun and getting me a slice of cake.

Mori… generally not speaking, but just the look of him… he was powerful, and actually amazing when it came to venting, because sometimes if Honey was in a particularly hyperactive mood, most of their guests would be watching the younger of the two, and I'd been able to sneak back to him and tell him about my bad day, and he'd lay a hand on my head and ruffle my hair and I felt happy again.

Haruhi being there to smile at me when I walked through the door, being delightfully polite and telling me one of the recipes of her mothers she'd recently tried out.

Kyouya being the polite gentleman he was brought up to be, sophisticated and intelligent, we could have long conversations about the stock shares, or the weather, or how Honey's cake consumption and sugar intake could probably kill a small child.

Then Tamaki… beautiful, boisterous, brilliant Tamaki. His smile, his laugh, and more or less everything about him I missed, besides the fact that he always had about a million people to tend to, and I felt I could never get a word in edgeways around those other girls.

On the plus side I'd excelled in my studies in the past month, and as long as I was working, then I hardly thought of the hosts. When I say hardly, I still think of them often, but it wasn't as obsessive as it used to be.

I miss the fun I had, and the fact that the hosts made me feel welcome.

Though I didn't want Kyouya to think I was giving in. I didn't want him to 'win'.

I sighed, and flopped over to my bed.

This was going to be harder than I thought.

X X X

"It's a sailor theme in Host Club next week girls!" the twins cheered, surrounded by girls as they continued to explain.

"Yeah, the girl with the best costume gets to win a one on one with any host she wants!" Kaoru said, to much screaming and clapping.

"But!" Hikaru exclaimed, "You cannot spend more than 16, 000 yen on an outfit!"

There was an outraged cry, shock and horror filled the girls faces.

"That means" the twins continued in unison "you won't be able to afford a tailor, really expensive materials or anything really expensive."

There were girls screaming at one another, and asking the twins what would be the best thing for them to do.

"Afraid we can't give any hints ladies! Now, we must be off" the laughed, leaping away from the crowd and jogging off.

I cast my eyes down and sighed. I wish I'd never have given up the club, it was so much fun. But even though I had gotten better grades in my recent tests, I was worse than ever in maths.

I trudged into my next lesson, unfortunately maths, and sat quietly at my desk.

People filed in as it got closer to the lesson starting, and Tamaki swept in about a minute before with Kyouya close on his heels.

"Hanna!" he cried, sitting next to me and draping his arm over my shoulder. "How are you?"

"I'm fine thank you" I replied, happy I could form sentences now, though I'd still blush like mad. I managed to keep most of my emotions in check.

"So, I saw you lingering about near the twins earlier" he said, giving me a cheeky grin.

"I was just interested is all" I said, putting the end of my pen in my mouth and chewing on it. A thing I found I did when I was around the hosts. It was almost a distractor for me.

"Well, Kyouya and I were talking it over, and if you want to just come to the event then we won't charge the fee or anything" he said, pulling my homework sheet closer to him and having a look.

He paused for a minute to read through it, and he smiled in an almost sympathetic way.

"You never know, princess, you might even win a one on one session with me. I could help you with your math."

I groaned and dropped my head to my desk, then noticed that Tamaki had a pencil and eraser out. He started going through my work and changed the wrong answers to the right ones.

Our tutor walked in, yet Tamaki ignored him and carried on, muttering to himself in French, which made me flush.

"Tamaki, stop, he's here" I whispered, trying to pull my sheet away. He seemed to lose patience, and grumbled, before erasing both our names and writing his on my sheet.

"Write your name there" he hissed, prodding his paper at me.

"No, Tamaki" I squeaked, internally doing some sort of muppet arm flail.

"Just do it before he sees, or we'll both be in trouble" he said quickly, his large violet eyes imploring me.

"I- fine" I hastily scribbled my name down, and tried to regain a calm composure. Our tutor came around and took the papers, glancing through them and smiling at 'mine', then looking at the sheet Tamaki handed in and he looked shocked.

"Tamaki, this isn't quite as good as your usual work" he said quietly, leaning in to stop listening ears.

"I know sir" Tamaki smiled slightly, rubbing the back of his neck "I had a bad night last night."

"Really? Well if one of my top students is struggling, then maybe I should extend deadlines…"

I bit my lip, and then he turned to me.

"Then again, if Hanna did so well, then I think you might be slacking slightly Tamaki."

I felt my eyes bulge, and Tamaki seemed to stiffen beside me.

"Um, no sir" I started, searching my head for something to say "I um... I actually didn't have much other homework last night. So I could concentrate on this more."

He nodded slightly, and walked away, not saying anything else about the matter.

I looked at Tamaki and felt my face go red.

"Why did we do that?" I asked, looking right at him.

"Because now princess" he smirked, looking at me sideways "You owe me."

Crap.


	7. Chapter 7

I want to give my sincere apologies to everyone on account of the fact that it's taken me roughly 4 months to get this chapter up... it shouldn't have done, and I'm a poor excuse for an author. Please don't send Tamaki after me...

* * *

So after that maths lesson where Tamaki bailed me out, I agreed to go to the sailor themed fancy dress party the hosts had organised.

I wasn't a hundred percent sure how other people would react to me just turning up, and I had mentioned this, very quietly, to Tamaki the next day in maths.

"Worried? Princess, ignore the others! You're a guest of mine, and the rest of the hosts. There's no reason to worry" he laughed loudly, grinning broadly.

I sighed and nodded. I suppose in some respect he's right, because I shouldn't let other people being so vindictive towards me upset me. I was kind of just scared that my inner bitch would come screaming out.

I got on with maths, and Tamaki helped me an awful lot in group work, still making sure I worked out on my own, but he guided me through a lot of the higher grade stuff while Kyouya watched on, bored. When it came to surds, I failed miserably.

"No, you're doing that wrong" he said quietly, and then he reached forward and took my hand, making me write the right things.

I felt my face, neck and ears burn, and I couldn't help but smile to myself. He leaned closer and said very quietly down my ear;

"You have to remember that a surd is a square root which can not be reduced to a whole number."

I nodded quietly, taking a deep breath and trying to calm myself. I shifted my head forward slightly to make my hair cover the side of my face. Tamaki paused his explanation for a moment, then carried on as if nothing had happened. Meanwhile I was trying to calm down.

I could feel his breath on my neck, warm and light, and his free arm was around my waist while he held my hand with the other. For a second, he rested his chin on my shoulder, and I eased back into him, and for a second I was willing to go back to the Host Club as long as I could do this… then I remembered that he had so many admirers, and I couldn't do this at all.

I thought I was over this! I thought I'd got a handle on these freakish feelings I have for the hosts… It wasn't like I liked them more than anything that was normal. I just craved the attention I got from them and I made me angry at myself. I shouldn't be like this…

When the lesson ended I couldn't have left the room faster.

I was walking down the hall, thinking about what I could wear when I felt something hard hit the back of my head.

"Ow!" I cried, my hand flying to touch the lump that was quickly rising on my head, then I looked down at the floor to see a large eraser.

"That'll teach you, you little cow" I hear someone hiss, and I turned to see the girl who had tripped me a few weeks ago. She'd changed. When she had brown hair and eyes, she now had bright flaming red hair and special contacts in to make her eyes look golden. She looked like a female version of the twins, and I thought it was kind of scary how far she was taking this obsession. Perhaps Mori banning them from club was not the best idea.

"Teach me what?" I asked, not backing down but trying to ignore the throbbing in the back of my head that was making me really irritated.

"To get us banned from the club!" she cried, stepping forward and shoving me back. "Don't answer me back!"

I sighed and looked away from her, making to leave. Apparently she didn't want me to leave, because I felt her grab my hair and she pulled me back. I screamed in pain and twisted to try and get her to let go of my hair, but she grabbed more and pulled it the other way. I could feel my roots being ripped out, and she just kept laughing.

"Get off me!"

I tried kicking her, but she yanked me the opposite way and I fell to the floor, where she aimed a kick at my face. I tried turning my head away, and braced myself for my teeth falling out, when I felt her let go of my hair and someone was picking me up.

"How DARE you!" I heard someone shout, and I turned to see Mr. Suoh baring down on her. "You're suspended, immediately!" he shouted.

I blinked tears out of my eyes, and looked to see who had picked me up. It was Kyouya, who looked concerned. Tamaki was stood slightly off to the side, looking furious and spectacular.

"Are you alright Hanna?" Kyouya asked, parting my hair for me and looking at my scalp where my hair had been ripped out.

"I'm fine, yeah" I said, swiping at my eyes to get rid of any tears that lingered.

"You're bleeding…" he muttered, touching my scalp gently and I winced when I realised how tender it felt.

"Bleeding?" Tamaki asked, snapping back into his senses. His father was still shouting at the girl who had ripped my hair out, and she was stood there crying, and begging him not to suspend her.

"Yes, look" Kyouya pointed to the spot, and Tamaki huffed.

"Right, let's go to the club room, we can look at her better there" he finally said, muttering something to his father before leading me away with Kyouya in tow.

Upon entering the room, I felt somewhat nostalgic. I remembered everything, and I wanted to jump on a sofa and refuse to leave, but I'd been doing so well, and I couldn't quit now.

"Hanna-Chan!" I heard Honey cry, and he latched himself around my waist. I smiled slightly, but had to mentally thank Tamaki for shooing him away. I was hurting.

"What's she doing back here?" the twins chimed, slinking up and sidling up to me, one on either side.

"She was hurt in the hall, we're making sure she's okay" Kyouya told them, glaring them down and handing me a cup of tea. "Please, Hanna, take a seat."

I did as I was told, and stayed quite still while I sipped my tea as Tamaki parted my hair again to see if I was still bleeding, then he pressed a tissue to my head gently.

"It's stopping… I can't believe she did that." He said, referring back to how the girl just attacked me.

"You're always getting hurt nowadays Hanna-Chan" Honey said, a sympathetic smile on his face.

"It'll be okay" I said quietly, watching Kyouya as he watched me. He smiled slightly.

I looked at him, questioningly, and he gave a small chuckle.

"Considering you thought you were a terrible person when we spoke a few weeks ago, you handled that quite well."

The other hosts looked at him, shocked.

"Mean?" Honey cried, now sitting on a surprised looking Mori's shoulders "No Hanna, you're really nice!"

"Agreed" the twins chimed, and Haruhi voiced her agreement not long after them.

"Hanna, you're not a horrible person" Tamaki said, and I felt dizzy because of how nice they were all being. I set down my tea as he tilted my chin up so he could look into my eyes. "You're a lovely, polite, caring and beautiful person. You're not like those other girls."

I nodded mutely, and blinked furiously to stop tears welling in my eyes. They were being so kind and I had no way to thank them enough for this.

I guess the least I could do for them would be to go to the sailor themed event next week.


	8. Chapter 8

Here's another chapter to sate all of your lust for fanfiction... you terrible people. enjoy :)

* * *

It took me ages to find a costume, but I did it, and it was well within the price cap the club had set for us all.

A lot of girls had gone in wearing similar stuff; blue or red skirts, striped shirts and a red neckerchief. I'd gone to a local fancy dress store and picked something out that looked cute and was fairly cheap. I was quite proud of myself in all honesty.

I was wearing a tutu dress, which was made of a kind of blue silky material over my bust, which then turned white under my bust to my hips, and had two thin blue stripes that ran down either side of my abdomen. The skirt was blue again, and pleated, with white lace around as trim. I had a shrug, which was white and made it look like I was wearing long sleeves, which were cuffed at the end with blue ribbon as the trim. I had on thigh high stockings, which had a blue bow sewn onto the front of both, and my shoes were white high heels, with blue heels and edges, and the print of a blue anchor on the outer side of each heel. I'd bought a cap, which was also white with a blue anchor printed on the front. It definitely fit in with the theme.

And to top off the look, I'd curled my long hair so it was a lot shorter than it usually looked, and I'd pinned it back to keep it out of my face.

I'd felt really embarrassed walking around school today, because a lot of people turned around and ogled me, especially the boys. They all seemed to take to wolf whistling too, which made me flush red again.

The club had chosen today for their event, because it was some sort of inset day for half the tutors, and therefore half of the classes would have been cancelled, so school chose to cancel all of them. They always left the building open on days like this for the people who wanted to come in and revise in libraries or those who generally had clubs to attend.

"Hey baby! You float my boat!" one of the guys off the football team yelled, making my face glow again…

Wishing I hadn't pinned my hair back, I carried on, forcing myself up the stairs to the Third Music Room to the Host Club.

The doors were already open, and there was already a lot of noise from those inside, so I walked in quietly, and stood off to the side, just watching for a moment.

Tamaki was wearing a white navel officers uniform, looking quite handsome in it, and I smiled almost ruefully. Whoever he had his eye on would be an immensely lucky girl, I could tell now. If he set his mind on something, he could do it. Tamaki could achieve anything.

Kyouya was wearing a blue navel uniform, obviously not captain, but most likely the first officer in this whole charade. He looked just as handsome as Tamaki, but without all the flamboyancy the blond had. He was calm, and collected, and looked like he was always planning something. Probably calculating how much this had cost the club, and how much profit they were likely to gain.

I knew the way the club worked, with it's finances, because about a year ago when they were a new club Kyouya had left his book behind on a desk in class – he had terrible flu that week, and wasn't himself – so I picked it up and returned it to him, but not before having a peek inside.

The twins were wearing shorts with stripes, shirts, and a bandana; Hikaru in a blue striped shirt, red shorts and red bandana, while Kaoru was in a red striped shirt with blue shorts and a blue bandana. They were laughing a joking and telling the girls closer to them stories about when they went on a cruise in Somalia, and they were almost invaded by pirates.

Mori and Honey were wearing white sailor outfits, complete with polished black shoes, and blue striped cuffs and collars. They also both had a blue neckerchief tied smartly around their necks, but while Honey had a hat, Mori did not. They were playing a game with some of the girls, where they'd shout commands and the girls would have to do the actions that went with those commands. Honey was shouting, while Mori ran around with the girls. It looked fun, especially when Honey shouted 'Captains woman' and they all had to start wolf whistling. Even the usually stoic Mori cracked a smile.

Haruhi was sat in the far corner on her own with a few girls. She was wearing long blue pants that came over her hips to her waist. There were buttons on either side of them, to make them look smarter, and her white shirt was tucked in, and she had on a blue neckerchief and shined black shoes.

They all looked quite smart, quite relaxed, and I realised that by standing tense at the door I stuck out like a sore thumb. I wondered how I'd gone from being right at home in the club to feeling like an outsider. It was stupid what missing a month would do.

I felt awkward and bit my lower lip, turned to leave and felt someone lay a hand on my shoulder.

I paused and glanced back, to see Tamaki smiling broadly at me.

"You look fantastic! But princess-" He started laughing "I doubt you managed to stay within the price limit with these beautiful clothes."

I gaped at him, then shook my head.

"No, see, I went to a fancy dress store, and this was only like… 8,000 yen. That's half the amount set."

"Really?" he cried, looking astounded "A commoners fancy dress shop?"

"Y-yes" I stammered, surprised by his reaction.

"That's amazing!" he turned around "Kyouya! Kyouya come here and look at this!"

I felt my cheeks turn pink, as Kyouya strolled over and looked me up and down.

"You look nice" he said quietly, complimenting me "how far did you go over budget?"

"She didn't Kyouya! She went to a commoners shop and bought this" Tamaki explained, looking gleeful.

Kyouya nodded approvingly, then commented, sounding tired "It's a lot more effort than some of these people have gone to. They've just worn their normal clothes and claimed they've spent nothing."

I was about to make the point that they would have had to spend money on their clothes in the first place, but Kyouya gave me a knowing look and just said;

"I know, but they don't seem to understand that."

He walked away, leaving me wondering if he could read minds, while Tamaki offered his arm and started leading me across the room.

We were passing the twins, Mori and Honey (who had abandoned their game) and the twins looked up, grinned widely and screamed "CAPTAINS WOMAN!"

All the girls who had been playing the game with Mori and Honey looked in my direction, and they all started whistling at me, the twins being some of the loudest, but no-one topping Mori and Honey, the smaller of which winked at me too.

I laughed slightly and waved at the twins, silently telling them to shove off, before I turned to Tamaki who looked bemused.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Sometimes I forget Honey-sempai is eighteen. He's not taking his eyes off you Hanna."

"Oh" I mumbled, which made him burst out laughing.

"Yes, anyway, the way this is going to work – I've explained it to the other guests, you were a little late arriving, so you don't know – yes, the way it's going to work is we're going to have a good look at every girl and we will all choose our favourite costume. We're then going to confer, and if we all agree on one girl, then that girl has to choose another six girls, and she can assign them a host."

"So, say you all chose… Kiki" I started, pointing at a girl who was wearing a pink sailor dress who I knew from Japanese history, "Then she could pick the guy she most wanted to be with, then pick another six girls to be with the other hosts?"

"Perfect example, yes"

"Okay, that's cool" I smiled, letting go of his arm while I sat on a sofa, next to a girl that looked me up and down and then sighed somewhat dejectedly. Tamaki went about fussing over everyone of his 'princesses' before going to get a pot of tea and a tray full of cups.

The girl next to me looked at me again and sighed, extending her hand.

"I'm Katia, Katia Doijang. You look amazing by the way." She said, and I took her hand and shook it.

"Hanna Konni. And I got this from a fancy dress shop" I laughed a little, and she giggled too. She was wearing a white skirt with little anchors printed around the hem, with a blue ribbon belt. She also had on a plain white top, a blue neckerchief, and just to stand out, she was wearing bright red heels. She had a pixie hair cut and greyish blue eyes.

"You look beautiful too" I pointed out, smiling widely at her "I love your shoes!"

"My God, I love yours too" she cried, looking at them "What size are you?"

"25.5" I said, swinging my leg up to cross it over the other "and you?"

"Same!" she cried, looking gleeful. "Can I try them on?"

"Yes, if I can try on yours?"

She nodded enthusiastically, and we traded shoes. Her heels were a good two inches shorter than mine, and as we both stood she stumbled a little and I had to be quick to stop her falling flat on her face. Tamaki had spotted last minute and seemed to have a mini heart attack. As he used a table to support himself, clutching his chest, about fifteen girls flocked to him, asking if he was alright and fussing over him.

"Gods, these are high" she cried, glancing to Tamaki then back at me. "Looks like I gave him a shock" she added, giggling.

"Yeah" I replied, biting my lip as he glanced over and we made eye contact for a second. "Who's you're favourite host?" I asked her, changing the topic and smiling at her, helping her take a few baby steps in the heels.

She grinned and dropped her head for a moment, before taking a breath and looking back at me.

"Honey" she whispered "but I hang around Tamaki because I get far too shy around Honey. I don't know what to say" she sighed and looked towards the bouncing third year.

"Why Tamaki though?" I asked, leading her back to the sofa and she happily tottered along.

"Because he has so many guests! I don't have to say anything half the time, you know?"

"No, I know the feeling." I agreed, helping her sit down and we swapped shoes back.

We were both quiet for a minute, then she looked at me.

"How do you wear such high heels anyway?"

I shrugged and mumbled about being used to it, then she jumped up clapping her hands.

"Let's go catwalk! You, me, right now!"

"Now? A catwalk?" I asked, as she pulled me to my feet and towards the twins.

"Yes! It'll be fun" she laughed. She left me stood beside a lot of the twins regulars, some of which turned to acknowledge me and smiled at my outfit. Katia whispered something to the twins, and they beamed back at her.

"Yes" they said, before standing on a table and announcing that there was going to be a catwalk and it would help them judge the best outfit.

All the girls in the room, besides Katia and myself, rushed over to where the twins had pranced to, and were lining one behind the other.

"You as well" someone said quietly from behind me, and I turned to see Mori smiling at me. I tried shaking my head but he gave me a stern look and I sighed in defeat. How could you argue with someone that barely spoke?

"You too Katia!" Honey cried, grabbing her wrist and leading her to the back of one of the lines. I was pointed to the other, and then Kaoru started everyone off.


	9. Chapter 9

Again, a gigantic thanks to everyone for reviews :) You're all fantasmic people whom I love so much!  
I don't own Ouran, but I wish I did. I'd be rich by now...

* * *

"Okay, ladies" Kaoru shouted, to the crowd of giggling girl, a blushing Katia (probably because Honey had spoken directly to her and she was over the moon) and myself… who was wondering what I'd gotten myself in for.

"Basically, this is your chance to impress" he explained, as Hikaru and Mori rolled out a long stretch of red carpet for us to walk on. "We'll all be watching for the parson with the best outfit, attitude and smile" he winked at a couple of girls close to him, and they swooned.

"The girls who we think look prettiest get to have a one on one session with the host that chooses her" Hikaru finished, bowing with a flourish, linking arms with his twin and the pair of them prancing back to a sofa.

Each of the hosts sat down, looking bemused and comfortable, Tamaki propping his feet up on a pouf, and raising his hand.

Instantly the whole room went silent, and every eye was on Tamaki. You could have heard a pin drop.

"Ladies… begin!"

I stood beside Katia who was watching intently as two by two the girls walked up the cat walk, struck a pose then walked back and filed off to the sides.

They all seemed to confident in themselves, but for the most part people were fighting to get ahead of the other one, standing in front of them and posing with arms spread out… kind of like Titanic… blocking the other person from view.

The line kept getting shorter and I turned to Katia when there were only about ten people left in front of us.

"Let's walk together, in time." I said, and she beamed and nodded enthusiastically.

When it came to our turn, we both took long, confident strides, our heads held high and smiles on our faces. When we reached the end of the makeshift runway, we stopped, stood back to back in a pose, turned and walked back down the carpet, hand in hand, giggling to ourselves.

When we were finished, the hosts stood and said they were going to deliberate, and would be back shortly to tell us who had won the one on one sessions. Tamaki announced that a special seafood buffet was open, and that we should enjoy ourselves in the meantime.

He bowed himself out, and I turned to Katia and started laughing.

"That was actually a good idea" I said, grinning.

"I know, I'm full of them" she said with a wink, and flicked her hair, then carried on "You know Hanna, I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship."

We walked over to the buffet and I picked up a slice of bread and some tuna, making a small sandwich.

"You think so?" I asked, as she did the same and I bit in.

"Yeah! I mean with my brilliance and your ability to recognise my brilliance, we're going to be friends for a long time."

I giggled and did a slight snort, astonished because I'd never done that before. I clapped a hand over my face and she burst out laughing.

"Hanna, I love you already. You're too cute" she pulled me into a one armed hug, and I smiled slightly.

After ten minutes of idle chatter, the hosts walked out and smiled at us.

Tamaki took centre stage – so to speak – and spread his arms open wide.

"My darlings! This piece of paper" he said, holding it up "has the names of the lucky few who have been chosen for the one on one sessions. If your name is not here, then please don't be disheartened. I think we'll have another of these some time soon, because it was amazing fun."

He bowed slightly, and all the girls around me tittered. He placed the paper on a table, and took several long strides back as the first wave of screaming girls ran for the paper.

I looked sideways at Katia, who was giving me the same expression, and we smiled.

"Leave them to it?" she asked, and I nodded. We hung back and made another sandwich each, trying to ignore the hardcore fangirls who had burst into tears, or every now and then a girl would scream in excitement then try to calm herself, smoothing her skirt out and looking pleased with herself.

Kiki walked over and prodded my shoulder.

"Hey, Hanna, you might want to go and look at the paper" she whispered, smiling broadly.

"Have you been picked?" I asked, ignoring the implications of her sentence.

"Yeah, by Mori" she did a tiny dance then seemed to centre herself. "But seriously, go look at that paper."

I nodded and shot Katia a look and she nodded too, we linked arms and swerved between the girls who seemed to be stood in the middle of the room in denial.

The paper itself looked like it had seen better days, with tearstain smudges, rips and creases, but the writing on it was still eligible, and I looked down to see my name written in elegant cursive writing, beside the name 'Tamaki Suoh'.

I bit my lip and my cheeks burned again, and part of me wasn't sure id he'd rigged it so he could help me in math, or if I was genuinely his choice, but I felt pleased with myself.

I kept reading, and the name 'Katia Doijang' was in bubble writing next to 'Mitsukuni Haninozuka'.

Katia looked overjoyed and frightened at the same time, but she kept smiling and I smiled right back at her.

I think we stayed the calmest, putting the paper back down and walking slowly away to the small huddle of girls who had been chosen.

The twins had chosen a pair of twins, with dirty blond hair and brown eyes. They grinned at us and gave us the thumbs up and introduced themselves as Leah and Amelia. Kiki was smiling to herself, most likely fantasizing about Mori, while a quiet girl with long straight black hair and black eyes sat reading a book, with a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. I suspected she was Kyouya's choice, and then turned my eyes to another petite girl with short brown curly hair and big blue eyes, and she must be Haruhi's choice.

"Who did you get?" Leah and Amelia chimed, in high tinkling voices that reminded me somewhat of bells.

"Tamaki" I said, and Katia followed with "Honey."

"Oh! The prince and the Lolita! Very nice" they laughed, winking.

I smiled slightly and rubbed the back of my neck. I then realised that Tamaki was stood up and talking again.

"Princesses, you all look delightful! We cannot wait to see you again. But unfortunately, we must part… au revoir!"

He blew a kiss, and the girls that looked put out before recovered spectacularly and tittered.

"Well, that was fun" Katia said, stretching her hands above her head and waving slightly to me. "I'll see you soon Hanna."

"See you Katia" I replied, waving back to her.


	10. Chapter 10

I've actually gotten back into the swing of writing this again, and in the past few days I've written about 3 chapters, whereas I hadn't done any for about 4 months... which is why it wasn't going anywhere... which I apologize profusely for again.

* * *

I got home, kicked my heels off and went to walk through into the parlour, but my mother and father were fighting again. I managed to peer through the door to catch a glimps of my father wrapping his hands around my mother's wrists, bringing her closer to him and snarling in her face. She winced away, turning her head so I could see her whole face, and it was only then that I noticed a fresh black eye.

"You're a filthy whore!" my father shouted, spitting in her face. He was probably accusing her of sleeping with one of the staff again, and of course she hadn't, because my mother was a thousand times better than that, but my father was an alcoholic, and once he was paranoid, then the drink would fuel him…

"No, I swear Jin, I haven't done anything!" she screamed back. He glowered again, screamed she was a liar, and threw her backwards. She tripped on the coffee table, but landed safe on the sofa.

My father started to storm out of the room, through the opposite door, and my mother seized that opportunity to throw her wedding ring at his head. She did this all the time, and it was when it hit him, he'd turned and looked to angry you could see the veins popping in his eyes… that was when I turned and ran upstairs.

I closed the door to my room as quietly as I could, and I lay down on my bed. I knew the tears were there before they even gathered in my eyes, but there was nothing I could do to stop them.

This was why I had relied so much on the Host Club. It would buy me another few hours away from this fighting, and arguing, and hostility. I remembered the first time my father had hit my mum. I'd told her I was going to an after school club and would be home late. When I walked in he'd pushed me into the door and yelled in my face, asking why I was late. To this day I can still remember the smell of vodka and tonic on his breath. My mother ran up to him, pulled him away and explained I'd been at club. He slapped her across the face, calling her every vile name under the sun, and had sent me to my room without supper.

I was also used to not eating in the evenings. I'd forced that habit, because half the time I couldn't be quick enough in the kitchen after school to make myself a sandwich, and father would fly into a fury.

This started a year and a half ago, but the arguing still got worse.

I know the reason I dote on the club members so much is because they've shown me that not all men are pigs, not all men are violent, and perhaps my mother was just unlucky in love.

I adored them, but I still felt uneasy around them so often because I didn't know enough about them to trust them completely. And I felt so guilty for pre-judging them.

The door slammed downstairs, and I leapt from my bed and rushed to the window to look to see who it was.

Father was storming over to his car, and was leaving. Probably to a bar.

Part of me wished he would die in a car accident… then it would be his own fault and me and mum could live happily and safe and unafraid. I never felt guilty for wishing him dead. He was killing my mother and he deserved nothing less… even if he was my father.

I left my room, going downstairs to see my mother curled up on the sofa, crying. There was blood on her hands, and my heart skipped a beat or three as I rushed to the kitchen to find a clean dishtowel or cloth, and the go back to help her.

She'd obviously heard me, because she was looking up when I came in.

She had a cut right under her left eye, and I felt like crying at how broken she looked.

"Here" I whispered, pressing the towel lightly to her left cheek, while kissing the other. She put her hand over mine, holding the towel in place as she curled into me, and sobbed. I shushed her, rubbing her back, but it didn't help.

He'd broken her. And I was the one left to pick up the tiny shattered pieces of my mothers' heart…


	11. Chapter 11

Hope you all enjoy this chapter :)

* * *

A week went by, and I didn't go back to the club after that day, which a lot of girls were annoyed at. One even cornered me in the hall and said that if I won that competition then I should at least make an effort.

I ignored and continued about my day, which was fine.

It was when I opened the door to someone at half past seven this fine Saturday morning that I got the surprise of my life.

"Morning princess!" Tamaki cheered, offering me a large bouquet of red roses.

"I- you- Tamaki? What are you doing here?" I flustered, accepting the roses off him while my face burned red. My hair was scraped up into the most awful ponytail, I looked a mess too, in bright hot pink pyjama bottoms and a grey Tinkerbell pyjama top. My dressing gown was hanging off my shoulder and I'd lost one of my slippers in my rush down the stairs.

Tamaki on the other hand looked as well groomed as always, his hair neatly falling all over the place, his everyday clothes neat and tidy and a bag slung casually over one shoulder.

He smiled kindly at me, looking me up and down, but I felt too tired to be hyperactive at this, so instead I yawned.

"You look beautiful Hanna" he finally commented, his eyes creasing up slightly as his smile widened, and he didn't look like he was lying or forcing this comment, but I couldn't help but scoff.

"Beautiful? I just rolled out of bed."

"So?" he said, taking a few steps closer to me, while slipping his bag off his shoulder and dropping it to the floor next to the coat rack. "You do look beautiful… especially when I can see your lovely face."

He reached out and gently brushed the back of his hand against my cheek, and I tensed slightly, but smiled non-the-less.

"Well I- that's flattering Tamaki, it really is" I started, backing away from his hand and moving to the stairs "But I kind of have to get dressed."

"Okay Hanna" he said, smiling in a bemused kind of way while watching me flee upstairs. I stopped half way and caught myself, turning to him.

"If you're hungry then there's plenty in the kitchen… if you don't mind making it yourself. If not I'll be right down."

He nodded politely, and looked through the doorway on his left to the kitchen and back at me, nodding.

I turned again and ran for my room, diving in and slamming the door behind me.

Part of me wondered why he was here so early on a Saturday morning, but I ignored that, focusing more on how nice he looked in black jeans, a red tee and his white sleeveless hoodie. He looked so casual and so comfortable in himself that I couldn't help but grin like mad. Then I stopped and realised he was waiting in my kitchen and I was up here taking my time thinking about him.

I was in a mad rush to have a wash, find some clothes and brush my hair through. After twenty minutes I was ready, not including makeup because I really didn't want to keep Tamaki waiting.

I was about to leave my room when I stopped myself. I turned slowly and looked in my mirror. I looked deathly white, probably from nerves, and my hair hung down over my face like a black veil. It made me look even paler, almost ill. Sighing I wandered over to my dresser, pulled open the draw, and was faced with a choice…

Makeup, or a bobble.

I tossed the ideas around in my head, and as much as I hated having my hair back, it would take another ten minutes to put on my face, but about one to brush my hair back into a high ponytail and tie it up.

I looked again, and I didn't look half as pale now, my eyes stood out more, and I looked nice in my outfit, which was a green tutu style skirt, a white tank top and a black cardigan. I slipped on a pair of black dolly shoes, and I was ready.

I hurried downstairs and peered into the kitchen to see Tamaki staring at the toaster, dumbfounded.

"You, um, need some help?" I asked, walking up to him.

He jumped slightly, then his jaw dropped.

"Hanna! You look… different!" he cried. I wasn't a hundred percent it sounded good, and I reached up to touch my hair, but he shook his head.

"No, you look so much nicer with your hair up!" he laughed, jumping forward and pulling my hand away from my hair. "You really do, you have such a pretty face."

I smiled and looked down; biting my lip to stop myself giggling like crazy over the fact that he was still holding my hand. He did notice after a moment and slipped his hand out of mine.

"So, yes" he started, chuckling nervously "could you help me make toast?"

"Toast, yeah, sure" I said, scooching past him, grabbing some bread from the bread bin and dropping it in the toaster. "Just put the bread in, push the lever down and wait a minute. Then you butter it and you're done."

"Thank you! You know, I've asked Haruhi countess times to show me stuff like this, but she-" he stopped then, realising his faire une gaffe, and tried to correct himself.

"I- I mean HE won't show me" he stammered, scrunching his eyes up.

"I know Haruhi is a girl" I stated, popping the toast out of the toaster and buttering it, offering him a slice, which he took after gaping for a moment.

When he did take it, he ran his free had through his hair and smiled in disbelief.

"When did you find out? I thought we- does anyone else know?"

"Oh yeah, most of the guests know. But they don't mind" I started, as he took a small bite out of his toast. "A lot of them just enjoy the company."

He nodded slightly, then shook his head and his usual confident smile returned.

"I'm not here to talk about Haruhi anyway! I'm here to spend a day with you!" he said, before biting into his toast. "We won't need that much to eat, I'm going to be taking you out for brunch, and it takes a while to get there. I was thinking though-" he continued, wrapping his arm around my waist and leading me back through to the hall, picked his bag up and walked me to the door.

"After brunch, we could find a nice place to study some math?"

I laughed slightly, and nodded in agreement. Part of me wanted to scream in joy, but I was getting better at repressing that feeling and being more normal around him. And it didn't take me five minutes to figure out that Tamaki wasn't half as flamboyant on his own as when he was with the rest of the club.

Today was going to be a fun day.


	12. Chapter 12

I know it was ages that I left this story, and I know I was a complete goon for doing so. But I'd like to focus more on my Fable story for a while and get that finished before I get everything done for this. So here is a chapter before I leave you kind people in suspense, and if you feel as if I've left it absolutely too long, then please don't hesitate to drop me a message or something. Just to kick my arse back into action :)

As usual, I don't own Ouran, only the characters and storylines of my design. Enjoy

* * *

He led me outside to his car, a Rolls Royce Phantom, where the driver was waiting with the door open for us.

I thanked him and clambered inside, Tamaki close behind me. I slid right over and he sat beside me, smiling. It was only when the driver set off and was halfway down my drive did I clap my hands to my mouth.

"Is something wrong Hanna?"

"We're doing math later, I should have brought my books" I sighed, hitting my forehead with my fist, scrunching my eyes up. I felt absolutely stupid, but Tamaki just laughed.

"It's no problem, I brought fresh notepads for us to use" he explained, digging them out from his bag.

I nodded, but kept my fist pressed against my head. God, was I that predictably dumb? He thought to bring notepads… Jesus…

He frowned slightly, and leaned forward, wrapped his hand around my fist, and brought it away from my head.

"Hanna, you act so strangely sometimes…" he said quietly, almost concerned. "I've seen you around, and you seem fine, then around me and the others you change."

"I do?" I asked. I thought I was creepy and obsessive all the time.

"Yes, you actually do. I mean, when you were with Katia Doijang the other day you were laughing and fine. Around me you always seem tense and quiet."

I turned away from him, blushing like mad. He saw that I actually acted different… was I supposed to explain to him now that the Host Club was the one thing I'd looked forward to every day. That would mean explaining about my parents, and I didn't feel like I could to that.

He seemed to realise I didn't want to explain, and he nudged my arm playfully.

"It's ok if you don't want to speak… I understand."

I shook my head… he didn't, but I couldn't let him know. I couldn't give him the chance to understand.

For the next half an hour, I sat quietly with my cheek pressed against the cold window, and I watched the streets fly by as we crossed town. I could feel Tamaki watching me, and every now and then he would lay a hand on my shoulder and rub his thumb gently across it. It was comforting, somehow, and I wanted to turn and hug him, and tell him everything.

But I couldn't.

We eventually reached this place we were going to for brunch, and I burst out laughing when I realised it was a McDonalds fast food restaurant.

He chuckled too, and smiled at me sheepishly.

"I've always wanted to try commoners' food" he said quietly, and I nodded at him before we headed in, ignoring the stares we were getting because we'd just stepped out of a Rolls.

"They must be rich or something" one woman said to her friend as we passed, staring at us.

I couldn't help but beam. This was something I hadn't expected Tamaki to do. I thought he was really high class, but I began to learn more about him. Over defrosted and heated up pancakes, and not so vanilla tasting vanilla milkshake he told me he'd been preoccupied with the 'lower classes' since Haruhi had joined the Host Club, and he found it really interesting since they did things so different.

It was cute the way he went on about it, his eyes got wider and his smile bigger. He lost himself in what he was talking about and I could feel his passion for it. Then all of a sudden he stopped smiling and propped his chin up on his elbow.

"Kyouya tells me I'm far too obsessive over Japanese culture, and common culture. He says I should grow up."

And in that instant I felt so sympathetic for him, and I reached out and touched his arm and smiled in as comforting a way as I could.

"If that's what you're interested in, then you should go for it" I smiled, and he flashed me a grin back.

"I am going to, I love learning about it" he said, stretching his arms up.

We finished eating our food, and took our drinks with us. He told his driver to take us to a local park, because it was a sunny day we could study outside.

We got there and wandered around for a small while, eventually finding a wooden band stand, and he sat down and pulled the math work out of his bag.

"I figured we would start from the basics, simple algebra, and then later on we can try some of those surds you like so much" he joked, winking at me.

I just smiled and sat down with him, and we talked and laughed and asked questions about each other, and I did everything perfectly. He was a better teacher than our tutor was.

"Why don't you teach the class?" I asked him, and he just smiled, and rolled on his back.

"Because I wouldn't know the things we're learning next month, and that would be bad."

I giggled slightly, then handed him my book and he had a quick skim through, nodding and smiling.

"You're doing a lot better Hanna."

"Tamaki, it's kind of all thanks to you" I pointed out, and he shook his head.

"No, I've hardly done anything, and you're getting it all right. I think you do know it, you're just lacking in confidence" he turned his head and looked at me, completely serious. "You need to believe you can do it, then you will be able to, just like this."

I smiled again, and after another half hour of maths, we eventually got bored, and he packed away, stood up and helped me to my feet.

"Fancy a walk through the park princess?" he asked me in a low, husky voice, while offering me his arm.

"Yes, of course" I replied, feeling my ears burn as I linked him and we walked back down a winding path that lead to the main road.

We were both quiet until I spotted the sunset over the trees, and the birds flying across the sky completely silhouetted by it.

"That's beautiful" I said quietly, nudging him.

He looked at me for a moment, lost in thought, before he turned his head to face the sky and he nodded slowly.

"It is."


	13. Chapter 13

I've not updated for far too long, so I am very sorry for that. I've had a lot going on recently, which unfortunately includes some deaths of friends and my dog :( Though I've had some fun times too! I made friends with a chick off here about 2 years ago, and though we live in different countries (I'm in England and she's a Scot) we've become like sisters or something, and she's next to me right now trying to read the entire story I've got so far :p Anyways, I hope you all enjoy, and please drop me a review :)

* * *

I was walking through the halls the Monday after I went out on my day with Tamaki that I felt someone jump on my back. Though I shrieked in surprise, I managed to keep my balance, and I didn't have an aneurism

"Go forth steed!" someone shouted down my ear, and I recognised her voice.

"Katia?" I asked, jumping slightly so she slipped off me and had to stand on her own.

"You know, it's no fun when you don't actually take me to my next class" she said, flicking my nose.

"It's also no fun when you break my spine."

"Yes, yes, I know" she waved her hand around, dismissing that idea, before she beamed at me. "How did your day go?"

"Well-"

"Mine was fabulous!" she screamed, shaking me by my shoulders "Honey is just an amazing guy!"

She told me about how he'd taken her out for a meal, and they'd talked about his martial arts, and because she seemed interested he'd taken her to his family's private dojo, and shown her a few basic moves.

"He's a completely different person in the dojo, Hanna" she carried on, walking with me down the hall. "He's so adult, and concentrated and… God, I'm in love" she faked swooning on me, but I still had to catch her, laughing.

I shook my head at her as she wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling herself up.

"Anyways gorgeous, how did it go with the princely type?" she asked, winking.

"We ate pancakes and then did math" I said, simply, not bothering to go into detail.

"Math? Is that you plus him, divide the legs, minus underwear-"

"NO!" I cried, pushing her to make her stop, and she doubled up laughing and nudged me back.

"Okay, so your time was boring."

"No, it was good! We had a great conversation and he helped me a ton in math" I explained, stopping outside my classroom door.

"Well, if you say so. Are you coming to club tonight?"

I thought for a moment, then nodded.

"Great! See you later then."

She skipped off to her next lesson, while I went into my class and grinned to myself about the new friend I'd met.

It was my Literature class, and we were going over Walt Whitman. I loved his poetry, especially 'Song of Myself'. It was all about loving yourself, and loving everyone else, ignoring social stigma and societies norms.

It flew by and soon enough I was in science, sat at the workbench across from Tamaki and Kyouya, who spent a lot of the lesson talking quietly together and glancing at me. I spent a lot of time trying to suss out what they were talking about, and I had the sneaking suspicion it was me. Kyouya kept smirking and whispering things to Tamaki, who kept shaking his head and smirking back.

It wasn't until after the lesson when Tamaki caught me that I had an idea.

He grabbed hold of my hand, but only for a second, which was enough to get my attention.

"Hi Tamaki"

"Hanna, Kyouya was wondering if you wanted to come back to club" he started, but Kyouya – who was stood behind him – kicked him in the shins, and he soon changed his tune. "Well, I was wondering if you were coming back to club… but Kyouya told me to ask, so it was kind of his idea" he added in a whisper, winking at me.

I nodded, smiling.

"Yes, I will. Besides, I kind of promised Katia I'd join her later."

Tamaki beamed and clapped his hands, his violet eyes lighting up, and even Kyouya smiled. I'd have wagered he was smiling because the club was going to make money off me again, and if I'd only bet some money I'd have won, because he proceeded to pulled out his black book and scribbled something down.

"We start at three thirty" he said, as he walked past, his glasses mirroring the light.

I shivered, and turned to Tamaki.

"I honestly do see why he's the cool type… but he's creepy too."

"You don't know the half of it" Tamaki whispered back, grinning. "I had a lovely day on Saturday, just so you know."

"Oh, yes, I did too" I brushed some of my hair back out of my eyes, but it fell forward again anyway. Tamaki reached out for me, and slowly brushed it back behind my ear, tucking it in place.

"You should wear it back more often. But I'll see you later princess, I have to go and make sure we've gotten enough roses for each girl today. We're trying to cheer up the ladies who didn't win a day out with the hosts."

He then went on his way, running to catch up with Kyouya.

The rest of my day was pretty much uneventful, until the last bell rang, I walked out of class and Katia jumped on my back again.

"Ride like the wind!" she screamed, eliciting laughs from the people around us.

I shook her off again, and turned to her, sticking my tongue out.

"How come I'm suddenly friends with you?" I asked, poking her in the chest.

"Because I'm brilliant, and you recognise that" she recited, laughing, smacking my hand away.

I rolled my eyes, and made my way into the nearest bathroom, while rummaging in my bag to get out a bobble.

"What're you doing?" she asked, following me.

"Tying my hair up" I said, scraping it all back into a high ponytail, the end of which still reached the middle of my back.

"It's really long… you should have it cut like me."

I looked at her pixie cut and shook my head, smirking.

"And look like Alice Cullen? Cute as she is, I don't want to resemble a freaking sparkly vampire."

She gaped at me, and then sniggered.

"Cut yours shoulder length then. You could look like Professor Snape."

"He's a hero, I'd gladly show my respects to him by doing that" I laughed, and then looked at her.

"You look fine" she said, before I could even ask my question "now hurry up, I don't want to be late."

And with that, we both went to club.


	14. Chapter 14

Here's another chapter, I hope y'all enjoy it :)

* * *

I decided not to spend my time in club with Tamaki; instead I walked over to where Kyouya was sitting and pulled up a chair next to him.

Without even looking up from his laptop, he asked;

"Would you like me to get you a cup of tea?"

I shook my head no, and he nodded slightly, making it obvious he was watching me out of the corner of his eye. He kept typing for a few more minutes, then sighed and shut the lid.

"Tamaki said he had a nice time with you, and apparently you aren't as dreadful in math as we all assumed."

I just nodded, and smirked a little. In my month and a half of abandoning club, he'd dropped some of his polite act with me, especially since he didn't see the need to be particularly pleasant with me in lessons, since I hadn't been a club priority.

I half suspected that some of that pretentious politeness would come back again, as I'd reintroduced myself back into the club.

He looked at me fully now, and nodded slightly.

"He was right."

"About what?"

"You do look nicer with your hair tied back."

I felt my jaw drop, and I turned my head in Tamaki's direction, to see that he was looking over at me in a slight daze, and seemingly had been for a moment or two.

"You're one of his priority guests. And that's quite a big thing, seeing as he is the president of this club" Kyouya said, pushing his glasses up.

I looked into his onyx eyes, and there was complete sincerity written in those usually unfathomable orbs. I felt myself nodding, but not knowing why, then I asked what I was dying to.

"Why?"

The corner of his mouth rose a little into a half smile, and he shrugged at me.

"You'll have to ask him that."

I slumped down in my seat, pouting. Why on Earth would Tamaki be so interested in keeping me happy?

I was on the verge of questioning Kyouya further, when I the twins shouting at one another.

"You're such a freaking idiot!" Hikaru yelled.

It went back and forth for a few minutes, them both getting louder, and Tamaki himself got involved and was getting more and more worked up. I stared, dumbfounded while Kyouya got up and strode over.

"Your mama wears too much makeup!" the twins screamed, before Hikaru shouted that they were over.

Katia had made her over to me, and was looking over at the group of hosts and girls who had gathered to watch this spectacle.

"Is it just me, or was that last insult a bit redundant?" she asked, sitting where Kyouya had been sat.

"What? Insulting their own mother? No, I think so too."

"Good, so I'm not the only one who thinks they're idiots."

"Nope."

Then Renge appeared out of nowhere and said she was so happy about all of this she could eat three bowls of rice.

"Ugh, but think of the carbs" Katia moaned, hiding her eyes with her hand and shaking her head, while I sat there giggling.

The twins stormed out and club was announced as 'over for the day' with many apologies from each host that was still there.

Katia and I were some of the last to leave, because firstly we did not want to follow the twins as quickly as possible to see what else was happening, and secondly because Katia wanted to finish her tea.

When we were leaving, Katia got a massive hug off Honey, and she turned bright pink and tried to laugh it off, but it came out as more a nervous giggle-snort.

I was walking past Tamaki when he stopped me.

"Hanna, sorry about that" he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's okay, honestly."

"Aha, that's good. And also-" he leaned in closer to my face, and said silkily "I do prefer your hair like this."

I blushed, and nodded quietly, while Kyouya sniggered behind Tamaki.

"Thanks" I muttered, moving to grab Katia by the back of her dress and drag her out "See you!"

We were half way down the hall before I registered I wasn't dragging Katia anymore, and was just holding her dress as she walked next to me. When I let go, she smiled.

"Good, you returned to your senses. Anyway, I was offering you a lift home?"

I just nodded and followed her, and I vaguely remembered giving her my address.

She was nattering away like nothing was happening, but I had this sick feeling in my stomach and I couldn't think why.

It was when her driver was going up my drive that I remembered why I should never accept a ride home from anyone.

"Just drop me off here" I cried, half way up.

"No, it's ok. It looks like its ages to walk form here."

"No, please" I whispered, feeling my heart clench.

"Don't be silly" she laughed. It was when we stopped and the door to my house slammed open did her smile fade slightly.

"What-?"

"Katia, be quiet. Don't say anything, and please don't mention this to anyone else" I said quickly, opening my door just as my enraged father got to the car, grabbed me by my hair and started shouting.

"Where the hell have you been?"

"Club" I answered as quickly as I could, trying not to cry. Katia's driver started getting out, but I waved my hand as discreetly as I could to stop him. Katia was sitting there looking appalled.

"Like fuck you were" he hissed, spittle flying from his mouth. "You can get out of here, and don't filthy up my drive again!"

Katia whispered something to her driver, and he didn't make any motion to start the car, instead giving my father an angry glare and moving again to come closer to us. I whimpered and shook my head slightly, pleading with him to stop, and he did, looking helpless. Katia looked like she didn't want to leave me like this with my father but she looked frightened and small, so I tried smiling. It felt more like a grimace. Eventually she left, looking back out of the window with wide scared eyes. I hoped she would stay quiet about this.

My father dragged me up to the house, threw me inside and slammed the door behind him.

"You're probably a filthy whore like your mother" he roared, as I stumbled to my feet, feeling sick and shocked, because this was the first time he'd ever been directly physically violent to me.

"I-" I started speaking, but something cut me off. It was only when I felt the sharp constant throb in my left cheek that I realised he'd hit me.

"Get out of my sight."

I didn't need to be told twice. I raced upstairs, into my room, locking the door behind me, and threw myself onto my bed, screaming and crying.


	15. Chapter 15

Slightly darker chapter, so I hope you read, leave a review and check out the next chapter tomorrow :)

* * *

I'd cried myself to sleep, I realised when I woke up, in my clothes, hair a mess and face tear stained.

My cheek felt tender, and I staggered over to my mirror to see a large purple bruise formed under my left eye, all along my cheek bone.

I started crying again, and went to take a shower, my tears mingling with the running water. I had to be fast, because I wanted to get to school as quickly as possible. I didn't want to be in the same house as that monster.

I didn't bother drying my hair, or brushing it through. I shoved a brush in my bag and grabbed my concealer. I had to hide this bruise, because I didn't want anyone to think something was wrong. I especially didn't want Katia to get overly worked up. I might have only known her a week and a bit, but there was something about her that I connected with and she did seem to be a good friend.

I tried smoothing out my dress as much as possible, and ran down the stairs as quickly as I could, grabbing my purse from the hall and pulling out my money, then grabbing some fruit from the bowl just inside the kitchen door.

I ran out, closing the door as quickly and quietly as I possibly could.

I went around the corner to find a driver, as they usually stayed around there until told to come round to the front for us.

A few of them were smoking and they were all talking quietly, until the oldest, who usually drove father to work spotted me shuffling my feet awkwardly.

"Miss- are you okay?" he asked, taking a small step towards me.

"Yes, I'm fine thank you" I said, trying to sound strong and confident, when in reality I wanted to fling myself at someone and cry for hours like a small child.

He nodded, unconvinced, then motioned for one of the other drivers to get a car.

I went to get in the car as he pulled it up, when my fathers' driver stopped me.

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asked again, his eyes lingering on my bruise.

I just nodded and climbed in, letting him shut the door behind me.

Soon enough, we were at school, and I thanked my driver before running in and finding the nearest bathroom. I put so much concealer over the bruise it looked stupid, but I'd rather people think I couldn't do makeup than know my father had hit me.

I left my hair down too, even though it was soaking wet and straggly, because maybe it would distract people away from my face.

I couldn't really do much more, so I gave up and left the bathroom, walked out into the main hall and was barrelled over by Katia.

"Hanna! Are you okay? What the hell was that about last night?" she cried, and I had to shush her, because the people starting to mill in early were looking at us.

"I'm fine, listen; he was just in a bad mood-"

"Bad mood?" she hissed, looking furious "Hanna, he was ripping your hair out!"

"Look it's nothing, I'm fine-"

"You're a liar!" she said, her eyes filling with tears. "You're trying to cover for him, and it's terrible."

"He's my father" I sighed, feeling defeated. "Please, please don't tell anyone Katia. Please."

She looked and me, angrily, went to say something but thought better of it, because she stopped herself and instead flung her arms around me.

"I can't keep this a secret! Hanna, he looked violent!" she whispered, her tears dripping from her nose as she pulled away to look at me.

"You have to… please Kat, I'm working it out but you need to keep it secret for now."

"I… if you EVER need anyone to talk to… I'm here for you."

She pulled me into a hug again, and I nodded into her shoulder, then she pulled away and changed the topic, though she still looked weary.

"You'll never believe what I've heard Hikaru and Kaoru have done."

"What's that?"

Well, apparently, Hikaru dyed his hair bright pink, and Kaoru dyed his bright blue. They're trying to make themselves look different to the other."

"Pink and blue?"

"Apparently."

"This… I have to see."

We both grinned, and were about to go looking for where the first year high school students would be, when both the twins barraged past us, f-ing and blinding at one another.

They were pushing each other, and eventually the one with blue hair, most probably Kaoru turned around and walked back past us, looking extremely put out.

"Hi Kaoru" we chimed, and he stopped dead in his tracks to look at us.

"Hi Katia, Hanna…" he kept looking at me for a moment, squinting, but he seemed to shake himself and continued walking.

"See… even he can tell something's wrong." Katia huffed.

We stood talking for a while, in which time I ate my apple and the bell rang for class. First was Literature, which I relaxed into, and because it was a double period, lunch came straight after, and I felt happy and tranquil as I walked to the cafeteria to buy some lunch.

I felt happy, that is, until I walked through the door and a chair came hurtling my way, smacking me in the face.

I fell backwards and yelped in shock and pain. It felt like I'd been hit again by my dad, and tears welled up in my eyes. I didn't think to stop them at first, but then remembered that my concealer wasn't waterproof, and I went to wipe my tears away only to wipe a lot of the makeup off.

Next thing I knew, I had Tamaki and Mori bending over me, while Kyouya yelled at the twins and they cried out apologies.

"Hanna! Gods, look at your face" Tamaki started, before jumping up to join in yelling at the twins.

Mori stayed there for a moment looking at me, until he gingerly reached out and rubbed his finger gently against my bruise. I tried flinching away, but he'd removed what was left of my concealer and was looking at me suspiciously. He knew for a fact that a bruise wouldn't form so quickly unless severe damage had been done. Of course my face was hurting more than ever, as when a chair comes into contact with your head at high speed, you tend not to feel top notch, but I wasn't unconscious or too badly hurt, I was just crying.

Tamaki came rushing back, and he then noticed the bruise properly.

"Hanna, we ought to get you to the nurse" he said, flustering. I jumped up, surprising the hell out of all of them, and shook my head.

"No, I'm fine" I said, starting to back away, but Mori caught my hand.

"Your cheek is bruised" he said quietly.

"No, I know. I did that last night" I lied, trying to smile convincingly when I saw Katia stood nearby looking horrified.

"How did you do that?" Kyouya asked, peering closer, which made me bow my head to hide my face.

"I walked into a door" I muttered, my face glowing red. "It's embarrassing okay? I didn't want people to find out."

And though he didn't seem satisfied, he didn't press me further. Tamaki looked extremely upset, and brushed his fingers across the bruise.

"You should be more careful Hanna…" he said quietly. I went to take his hand away, but then he moved it back quickly. I flinched slightly, and he looked upset at my reaction but continued, and moved my hair out of my face.

His eyes looked sad. Not like when he was pouting or upset he couldn't get his own way in club, but heartbroken.

I felt my eyes cloud with tears, and I turned and ran away.


	16. Chapter 16

Second chapter as promised :)

Enjoy

* * *

I was sat in a bathroom stall crying when I heard two people come in. One was Katia, which I sussed out pretty quickly when she started hammering on the stall door.

"Open up!" she told me, hitting the door. "Come on, and then we're gonna get this thing sorted out now."

"Go away" I told her, and whoever it was with her.

There was a quieter rapping at the door, and then I heard Kyouya.

"Hanna, is something happening at home? Is everything ok?"

"Just leave" I said again, ignoring the concern in his voice.

"Please, Hanna, just come out" Katia said, pulling herself up to peer over the door.

"Nothing's going on, nothing's happening, I suggest you leave Kyouya, and don't bother telling anyone else about this-" I wrenched the door open to glare at them "because your making it out to be something it's not."

I shoved past them and stormed out, past Tamaki, Mori and Honey who were waiting outside the door and down the hall.

I kept going until I was at my next class, walked in early and sat down. I felt angry. I'd told Katia not to say anything and she had! I'd told her not to! She said she wouldn't but she lied, and I knew she'd only done it because she was worried about me, but it wasn't her place to say anything.

Fifteen minutes later, about ten minutes before lesson was due to start, Tamaki and Kyouya walked in, talking quietly about how at least now the twins had stopped fighting, but they spoke even quieter when they saw me sat there at my desk.

Neither of them said a word to me, but I could feel their eyes boring into the top of my head, and I felt like screaming at them.

I ignored every word during the lesson, and I wasn't completely sure which lesson I was in.

The day ended, and I left for home fairly quickly. I felt vacant the whole way I got out and went straight upstairs to bed without having eaten properly that day.

I got changed, crawled into bed, and fell right asleep.

X X X

I woke up in the morning, got ready for school, and waited in the kitchen. To my surprise and… horror… my father walked in. He was hungover, but sober in his own way. He was a different man when sober. He was like he was when I was little; the gentlest man on Earth.

He would never have hurt a fly, and he doted on my mother and myself. But a few years ago he lost a big part of his company thanks to the start of a recession, and he turned to drink. Even when things picked up again he didn't try and change, and the only time I'd see a shadow of my dad – not my father, my dad – was in the mornings.

He walked past me to go to the coffee pot, then stopped himself and turned back to look at me. He seemed awkward, and I hung my head to avoid eye contact.

"Hanna" he started quietly, moving further towards me.

"Yes?" I said just as quietly, turning my head slightly to look at him out of the corner of my arm.

"I-" he reached forward and hooked some of my hair behind my ear, so he could see the bruise. I flinched away from him, and I heard his voice crack as he tried to continue "I'm sorry baby girl."

I just nodded and turned my head away from him, listening for his actions rather than looking for them.

He pulled a chair out and sat down next to me.

"I promise I'm going to change. I'm going to get off the drink. It's going to be like old times."

I just nodded again, then checked the clock up on the wall to see it was time for me to leave.

All I could think as I was walking out of the door was 'too little, too late'.

X X X

I saw Katia walking down the hall to her lesson at about break time, and I launched myself at her, hugging her tightly.

"I'm so sorry about yesterday!" I cried down her ear, as she hugged me back.

"It's ok Han… If I'd gone through – that – then I'd be a bit miffed too."

We shared a small laugh, and then linked arms as we walked together.

"Are you coming to club tonight?" she asked, looking slightly worried about my reaction.

"Yes, of course! Besides, I really have to apologise for being a bitch to Kyouya."

"No, he understood. He was actually really worried you know. He doesn't show it often, but he really was. Tamaki too. They spent ages talking about whether to follow you or not, and they eventually decided to give you some space."

"They were really worried?"

"Of course! We all were… although, Mori and Kyouya kind of suspected it wasn't you walking into a door."

"You didn't tell them anything?"

"No, I promised you I wouldn't. But Kyouya's father is a doctor, and Mori has been hit enough times… I knew what it was when I saw the bruise uncover."

I shrugged, and smiled slightly at her.

"It's really nothing." I told her, and she gave me a stern look.

"Don't try and feed me that bullshit." She snapped, but sighed and dropped it.

We spent the remainder of out break together, then I went off to my lesson, math.

I'd barely walked through the door when I was pulled into a warm embrace.

Whoever it was, they were warm, and they smelled very nice.

"It'll be okay Hanna, I'll be here for you" Tamaki whispered in my ear, and I tensed immediately. He didn't let go though, and he didn't even seem put off. He seemed to understand, and he just held me tighter and I soon relaxed into him.

I'd have to go to club now, I couldn't well have the best hug off Tamaki and then not go.

Lessons went by faster than usual that day, and I was happy to meet Katia in the hall and make our way to the Host Club.

We walked in to see they hosts had gone for a sort of Arabian theme for themselves, and they were dressed in silken robes. There were lengths of soft material draped around the room, along with an assortment of intricately carved pillars. The only thing that looked off was the fact that there was a young boy sat beside Tamaki as he was trying to talk to one of his guests.

Katia skipped off to sit with Honey and Mori, while I wandered across the room and stood close to Haruhi and Kyouya, who were looking at Tamaki and this boy too.

"Don't you think it's weird he's making the kid observe him up close like that?" Haruhi asked, looking uncomfortable. Kyouya on the other hand maintained a smooth, calm demeanour and smiled to himself while he answered.

"There is a theory that people are considered more beautiful the closer they are viewed. Tamaki seems to live by that theory… well, let's leave them alone."

I nodded to Kyouya as he turned around, but something made us freeze still. It was the boy, verbally abusing Tamaki's customer.

"You look more like the carp that swim in my pond at home; I would never give false compliments like that!"

The girl started to wail, and Tamaki did an awful job of trying to clam her down, calling her 'the most beautiful carp of them all', to which she responded by running away calling him an idiot.

I stifled a laugh, and muttered to Kyouya;

"From the mouths of babes." He chuckled to himself and nodded.

Tamaki looked visibly angry at the kid, and the twins sidled over to him, laughing.

I knew what was coming next; their stupid brotherly love routine, so I turned around and walked to make myself a cup of tea, then find an empty seat to watch the show.

The boy screamed at the twins, scared about their 'twincest' act, calling them homosexuals. Tamaki was looking more annoyed by the second.

Then add Honey and Mori to the equation, and it didn't get any better, as he questioned Honey's age – quite understandably though, he did only look young – and then freaking out when Mori walked over and stared down at the poor kid.

He backed right into Haruhi, and called her a cross dressed… which technically she was.

"Okay! That's enough, I think Shiro should take care of the tea for us, don't you?"

The twins were ranting saying how Haruhi looked manly, and I laughed quietly into my tea.

Haruhi tried passing the tray to Shiro, who promptly dropped it and blamed it on her.

"Haruhi, that's another one hundred thousand yen."

That was a little harsh…

Katia had made her way over to me, shaking her head.

"Bad day today" she commented, as Tamaki started screaming and locked Shiro in a cage, the twins looked about ready to beat him, Honey and Mori were eating cake and Haruhi looked like she wanted to kill herself.

"Yes" I agreed, then Renge appeared again. "And it just got worse, let's go."

We passed Kyouya who had just finished explaining the traits of each host to the trapped boy. I peered over his shoulder to see that he was idly drawing a picture of Renge in a noose, and I tapped him on the shoulder.

"Hanna, Katia, is everything alright?" he smiled, but I couldn't get past the whole noose thing.

"Um, well it's a little hectic in here, so we're leaving early" I said quietly to him, so no-one else could hear.

"I apologise, we'll completely reimburse you your cost, and for the next week there's no charge for you two ladies."

"Oh, there's no need-" Katia started, but he cut over her.

"It's quite alright, we hope to see you soon" he said quickly, turning when Renge was making Shiro run across the room and fall flat on his face.

"Try not to kill anyone Kyouya" I said quietly, and he grimaced slightly.


	17. Chapter 17

I decided I'd post another chapter today before I go away for the rest of the week working in Kilmarnock (Scotland). It's gonna be a blast, but very hard work. Leave a review please, it'd make my day for me :)

Enjoy x

* * *

I got home and went quietly inside. If my father had been drinking again, he wouldn't remember much about this morning. And I hardly expected him to be sober, because he'd promised my mother and I in the past that he would clean himself up, and we were still waiting for that day.

There was no noise, and I poked my head into the parlour to see him passed out on the sofa, with about five empty bottles of vodka around him.

"Hey" I said quietly, to try and get a response out of him.

Nothing.

"Dad?" I said louder, walking into the room and dumping my bag on the chair.

He didn't move, and I felt my stomach clench.

"Dad? Wake up" I told him, walking to him, leaning over him and shaking his shoulder.

There was a nasty smell coming from him, and he was making a gargling sound. It was then I realised what was happening.

I rolled him off the couch and right onto the floor, on his side, and almost instantly he coughed up a lungful of vomit onto the carpet.

I hurried to put him into the recovery position, my heart pounding away in my chest, and when I was satisfied he'd be fine, seeing as he was breathing now, I got out my mobile and phoned for an ambulance.

It came within moments, and I had to give them all the details of what had happened, and then I walked up the stairs, and saw my mothers' bedroom door was ajar.

I pushed it open to see her sat on the edge of her bed. She looked… disappointed.

"Mum?" I whispered, and she looked up at me. Her green eyes, the ones that looked so much like mine, were dead. She was a shell of the woman she once was.

"I wanted to leave him" she said, so quietly, but it felt as if she were shouting. "Leave him to die, and rot. He deserves to…"

"Mum, you can't-"

"Can't what Hanna? Hate him? Wish death on him? I told myself so many times I'd stay strong and get through this. Help him and we'd be a happy family again."

I stayed quiet and still, shocked at her words, hurt and disgusted at the same time.

"But he's killing us Hanna…" she looked back to her feet. "He's beating me, and you're starving yourself to stay out of his way… I know you don't eat dinner. I know you only eat fruit and a sandwich every day. He's going to kill us, and he doesn't care."

I shook my head and back away from her door.

"He said he'd change" I choked, remembering how sorry he looked this morning.

"And has he? Do you think if he hadn't passed out he'd be a pleasant person when you walked through the door?" her voice quivered, and I felt tears rush to my eyes. "I didn't ask for this Hanna. I didn't ask to be the wife of an alcoholic, his punch bag and still the good wife who has to smile and act like it's all alright! I especially didn't want my baby girl to have to act like its all fun and games to her friends."

I felt tears burning paths down my face, and I tried to rub them away angrily.

"What did you tell them? Not that he hit you, oh no, what did you do Hanna? Did you trip and fall? Walk into a door? There are only so many lies you can tell… they'll know sooner or later."

"They already do… Katia knows." I told her, though she'd have no idea who Katia is.

"And has she tried to help you? Has she told someone so they can get rid of him?"

"No, I told her not to" I retorted, feeling defensive.

"Then she isn't a good friend…"

I shook my head and walked away, storming into my room and slamming the door. I couldn't believe how angry I felt with her, but I did because she was going to happily leave my father to die. If she wanted rid of him so badly, then she should divorce him, or tell someone herself.

I did remind myself that she was probably afraid of him… that she would be too scared to go herself, but if someone else did then maybe she'd get out of this whole things without being scared for her life.

I stripped off and went into the shower, washing myself furiously, trying to rid the image of my dad being rushed away out of my mind, as it was haunting me… and thinking about what mum had said.

I know I'd dropped a dress size over the last few months due to not eating dinner, but I still ate. I went out with Tamaki and ate McDonalds, which was fun.

I got out the shower, after sitting in the warm running water twenty minutes after I'd finished and looked into the mirror.

Yes, okay, I was thinner, but I knew it wasn't my fault. I couldn't help it… I pressed my hands on my flat stomach and sighed. If it would stop her getting so upset, I'd try to eat more breakfast and lunch, because I couldn't eat dinner.

I'd make the effort. Someone in this house should.

* * *

The top floor, of the south building… at the end of the north corridor…

It was the most beautiful music, and I felt myself relaxing into it. I'd gone to see Tamaki, but I'd heard a rumour circulating that Host Club was shut for a week so Tamaki could teach Shiro how to play a certain piece on the piano.

Every so often Shiro would go wrong, and he's start shouting and I could hear Tamaki telling him to calm down, before they carried on.

I had wanted to thank Tamaki, not only for being a good friend, but for helping me in math. I'd managed to pull my grade up to a B-, but I really wanted to get to an A, so I was going to ask him to help me out again, so I could boost myself again.

I sat on the window ledge, and leaned against the glass panes, relaxing. The music stopped eventually, and I saw Shiro exit and walk away. He didn't seem to notice me, but continued on his way, muttering to himself all the while.

I waited two minutes, then knocked on the door and walked in a little bit.

The majority of the hosts were sat in the corner discussing plans for the future clubs, and Tamaki was over by a piano, wiping the keys over, before turning to see me.

"Hanna!" he smiled, beckoning me over. I walked quietly, smiling slightly at the others as I passed them before stopped short of Tamaki.

"How can I help you princess?" he asked, pulling the piano bench out and sitting on one end, motioning for me to sit with him.

"Well" I started, perching next to him. "I went to get my grade for math-"

"Yes, how'd it go?" he asked, swinging one leg over to rest on the other, making himself comfortable.

"Really well! I've pulled up to a B… but I was wondering if I could ask you to keep helping me… so I can get to an A."

He paused for a moment, took a breath and blew it out. Then he laughed.

"I would, I'd honestly love to, but I'm quite busy this week…" he said, rubbing his chin. "We do have a test in a month, so how about from next weekend onwards?"

"Sure" I agreed, smiling, and he laughed again.

"I remember a few months ago when you couldn't look me in the eye… you've changed so much" he said, reaching to brush my hair out of my face, leaning slightly closer. I leaned back slightly, not even aware I'd done it until he frowned.

"Have I done something? You shy away a lot."

I shook my head, smiling.

"It's not your fault, just something I'm working through at the moment."

"Anything I could help with?" he asked kindly.

"No, I don't think so."

He shrugged slightly, then twisted around on his seat. His fingers dancing over the keys before he looked at me.

"Ever heard this one?"

I turned around as well, then listened as the beautiful music filled the room. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, relaxing.

"Yiruma if I'm correct" I said quietly, and Tamaki smiled at me.

"Of course, and you have a great taste in music by the way." He said, smiling as his fingers moved so swiftly over each key.

"Thank you…" I said quietly, trying to suss out which song it was he was playing.

He never told me though, just smiled contentedly while he played and then eased back and looked at me. We kept eye contact for a minute, and there was something in the depths of that violet pair, but I couldn't figure out what.

Then there was a cough from behind us, and I remembered that the others were there.

"Um, anyway, thank you for saying you'll help" I said quickly, standing up and slinging my bag over my shoulder.

"You're leaving?" he asked, pouting slightly.

"Sorry Tamaki, I'll see you soon!"

"Bye!" he called after me, as I ran down the hall.


	18. Chapter 18

I've been in Kilmarnock for a week :D (Scotland) and I've earned me some money so to celebrate I'm going getting myself a new desk chair from IKEA and probably some shelves! I can finally sort out my bookshelves and have my Potters and Golden Compasses on show! Excitement!

So anyway, thank you to the people who reviewed and those who read my story so far. I'm running out of chapters to post but I should write some more soon.

Enjoy~

* * *

My father returned home at the weekend, looking tired and grumpy, but he spent a week without drink.

I think that made him worse than the actual drink did, or at least at the beginning of the week it did. He'd scream and shout and throw things at us. I was fleeing the room once when he threw a vase at me, and when it shattered above my head, the splinters of china rained down on me, leaving little cuts… apart from one piece which stuck right into my right arm and cut me deeper.

He never even apologized; he shouted that it was my fault, and that I was as useless as my mother. Then he'd round on her, saying she was lucky she had him, because any other man would have thrown her to the curb like 'the bitch she is'.

A lot of the time, my mother would walk out and cry. And I'd feel bad for her, because she's hurting so badly. But then I think about how she was going to leave my dad for dead, and I couldn't help but feel a little repulsed.

I don't know what it was, because I completely agreed with her; we would have been so much better off without him. And I kept replaying it over in my head. Maybe if I'd stayed another ten minutes at club. Maybe if my driver hadn't taken another road to avoid traffic. Maybe if I'd gone right upstairs, and not into the parlour… maybe he would have died, and though I would have felt sad, I wouldn't have this huge weight on my shoulders of what could have been.

And my mother seemed to blame me too. I caught her every now and then giving me looks of pure hate. Blaming me for the fact that her pain was carrying on…

Both my parents hated me…

* * *

Three weeks passed, and in that time Tamaki had been helping me better myself in math. I'd never let him come around to my house, because my father would have accused me of sleeping with him, been violent and Tamaki would never have wanted to see me again.

So, I'd always been going out with him to different places to study, and we had loads of fun and we were getting closer.

I found it hard to be around him sometimes, because he was so nice to me, and he seemed to act differently around me than he did with other girls. He was polite as always, but he'd talk to me more, about himself and his parents and his life. He introduced me to some of his favourite music, and I did the same for him.

I actually really liked him, but I don't think he had any idea of it, which for the most part I was glad of.

It all went wrong on Saturday morning.

I heard the front door bell ring as I was brushing my teeth, thinking it was only eight o'clock, I wondered who it was.

Then I felt my stomach sink when I realised the clocks had changed, and my father was already shouting angrily about people bothering him, trespassing on his property.

I was an hour late for Tamaki… he'd come to get me.

I raced from my bathroom, across the landing and down about half the stairs when my father was pulling the door open.

"Good morning sir, I was wondering if-"

He was cut off mid sentence.

"Who the hell are you?" my father slurred. Tamaki paused, offended by the rudeness, but continued nonetheless.

"Um… I'm Tamaki Suoh, sir, I was wondering if Hanna lived here?"

He thought he was at the wrong house… this was getting worse, but I was too scared to move.

"What do you want with my daughter?" my father asked, louder and more gruffly. Tamaki tensed and took a baby step backwards. His eyes flitted around nervously; then he saw me on the stairs. He smiled a little, but my father turned to see who Tamaki was looking at.

"You, who the hell is this," he yelled at me, and I felt like a deer caught in headlights.

"Well?" he shouted louder, and Tamaki looked shocked.

"Tamaki" I told him, racing down the rest of the steps, and trying to look him in the eye. "He's a friend from school, and he helps me with math."

He snarled and prodded my chest, leaning in so close I could smell the vodka on his breath.

"Don't lie to me… you're screwing around with him, aren't you?"

I felt my mouth drop, and Tamaki was the one who spoke;

"What? Sir no, you're making a mistake-"

"Stay out of it!" my father screamed at Tamaki, and then rounded back on me. "You're a slut, like your good for nothing mother."

I heard the slap before I felt it. He'd backhanded me, and I stumbled over as he went to hit me again.

I braced myself, closing my eyes and tensing up, but it never came. I looked up slowly, to see Tamaki holding my fathers arm back and glaring him down. He was about three inches taller, but my father still stood his ground.

"You think you scare me boy? You think you threaten me? This is my house" my dad started laughing, nastily, and Tamaki just continued glaring. He looked absolutely livid, his eyes narrowed to slits, nostrils flaring though that was most probably from the stench of spirits and his lips barely moved when he spoke.

"You will never lay a hand on Hanna again… or by God, I will make you sorry. This is not a threat… I'm promising you… you will regret the day you were born."

He shoved my father back, who stumbled in his drunken stupor. He then turned to me, scooped me up off the floor and walked quickly away with me in tow.

"Hurry up Hanna" he said under his voice, tugging me a little farther. I heard a smash right behind me, and sharp objects flicked against my legs, so I screamed and whipped my head around to see he'd thrown his bottle at me.

Tamaki ignored this, pushing me into his car ahead of him, and as soon as we were in the driver sped away.

I didn't realise I was shaking and crying until Tamaki pulled me closer and started using his jacket sleeve to mop at my face.

"Why did you never tell me you lived with- with THAT?!" he said, still angry, but upset too.

I shook my head wildly, gasping for breath and shoving my head into his chest. He sighed heavily, and wrapped his arms tightly around me, holding me closer and shushing me quietly.

"Take us to Kyouya's please" he said to the driver, as he bent his head over mine and whispered that it would be okay, that he'd help me, that I was safe now. But I kept sobbing into him, clutching at his shirt.

* * *

"He what?"

"Hit her, right in front of me! That- that- argh!"

Tamaki turned and booted the chair, stubbing his toe before collapsing into the chair he'd just assaulted, a string of swear words pouring from his mouth in a mix of Japanese and French.

I sat on Kyouya's couch, feeling very small and scared as both boys fumed,  
Tamaki slumped in the chair, Kyouya storming about the room. I also felt quite undressed, as I'd pulled on a pair of old denim shorts and a small white tee. I hadn't even got shoes on thanks to the commotion.

"Then he went to hit her again while she was on the floor. He's a coward to hit a woman in the first place-"

"Kicking someone while they're down…" Kyouya hissed, adding to Tamaki's sentence, but neither finished it. What could you say?

They both turned to me then, Tamaki's expression softened, but Kyouya looked more annoyed.

"You lied to me." He snapped, crossing his arms.

I didn't reply, I just hung my head. What could I say? It was true, I had lied to him.

"Kyouya, she- what? Has… has this happened before?"

I screwed my eyes up and prayed for them to stop talking about it, but they carried on.

"The other month, when the twins fought, she lied about the bruise on her face then."

There was a pause, and then I saw Tamaki's feet in front of me. He crouched down, and lifted my chin with his finger. Looking me right in the eyes, he asked me quietly.

"Has this happened before?"

I bit my lip, tears filling my eyes and I nodded slightly, and that was enough for Tamaki to fly into a rage again.

"He's a disgrace, he should… I… Lord, give me patience; give me strength…"

He sat down heavily on the chair again, bent his head and started muttering to himself in rapid French. Kyouya sat down beside me, and when I looked at him, he looked so sincere and kind, it took me by surprise.

"How many times has he hit you?"

"Twice" I replied after a moment.

"Has he done anything else?"

"Yes."

"What has he done?" he asked, looking at me intently, and when I glanced over to Tamaki, he was looking at me, hiding his mouth with his fingers, but I could still see the anger in his eyes.

"He threw a china ornament, or vase at me. It broke and cut my arm. And he's pinned me to the door before. That's it."

"That's it?" Tamaki asked, sounding surprised. "That's all he's done to you?"

I nodded slightly, then inhaled deeply. "He normally hits my mother, so it's rare he touches me."

"Where's your mother?" Kyouya asked suddenly.

"She went out for the day." I whispered, and he and Tamaki relaxed slightly.

There was silence for a moment, then Tamaki asked;

"How could someone care so little for his child?"

I felt the tears spring to my eyes, but before they had chance to even leak out Tamaki was beside me wiping them away, and Kyouya had laid a reassuring hand on my shoulder.

"Hanna…" he started, removing his hand from my shoulder to push his glasses up. "Would it be okay with you if I got the police involved?"

I paused, then nodded. I'd promised myself I would make the change. This had to be it. It had to be my father leaving. It couldn't be anything else.

He left then, and it was just Tamaki and I.

He looked awkward for a moment, then he smiled softly.

"Do you want me to play piano? I always did for my mother when she wasn't well, or was upset."

I nodded, and he took my hand and led me to a large black piano stood in the corner. He got me to sit beside him on the bench again, and again his fingers danced over the keys, playing the beautiful Yiruma melody that I still couldn't think what the name was.

I didn't realise that I'd leaned against him, but when I did he didn't seem to mind. I looked up at his face, and I looked at how concentrated he was. How focused, and intense his eyes were, and how handsome he was overall.

When the song did come to an end, he turned his head to look at me, his violet eyes locking with my green ones, and he stooped just a little so our lips brushed against each other.


	19. Chapter 19

Okay, so here's another chapter :) Sorry I haven't posted on this in so long, I've been swept away with my other fanfic 'Balverine Child'. It from a game called Fable, on the Xbox and I love it. If any of you like the game and wanna take a look, please do. If you have no idea what I'm talking about feel free to look anyways, it's always good to get into new things ;) anyways, enjoy my pretties!

* * *

I paused, trying to process what had just happened, while Tamaki was looking positively nonplussed.

Then it registered that he'd kissed me, and my head went right into a whirl. I wrenched away from him, almost falling off the seat as I did, but he snapped back into attention and caught me around my waist.

"Hanna, I'm sorry!" he said quickly, his face burning bright red. "I-I don't know what came over me… God with everything that's happened I don't know-"

I sat with my hand pressed against my lips. I had no idea what came over him either, but I wasn't exactly complaining. Then I realised how it must have looked when I jumped away like that. No wonder he was getting so flustered.

"No, Tamaki it's fine. You... you were just trying to make me feel better," I said, trying to calm my voice, but it still trembled. He shook his head and dropped it down onto the piano, the keys pressing down and clashing, making a horrible sound.

"I shouldn't have done that… I should not have done that…" he kept muttering, and for some unknown reason, I started to giggle.

"What-? What's so funny?" he asked, confused.

"Tamaki, I don't mind… I honestly don't," I tried to tell him, but he continued looking confused.

I sighed and pecked him on the cheek.

"We're even now," I whispered, just as Kyouya walked through the door with three men dressed in black.

One looked like security, or something. The other two closely resembled Kyouya. The eldest man, about the same height as Kyouya, bespectacled, with greying hair, a moustache, and a small goatee, while the other man was slightly taller than Kyouya, still with black hair though, but it was slightly more ruffled and unkempt. They were all looking at me with some concern.

The eldest man, Kyouya's father I assumed, walked over briskly and extended his hand to shake mine.

"Yoshio Ootori," he said, introducing himself. "Kyouya's made me aware of the… situation. I will personally see this through for you."

I nodded, and whispered a small 'thank you', while the other man cleared his throat.

"I was wondering if you'd let me assess your bruises and… other possible injuries."

I looked blankly at Kyouya, and he nodded his head, explaining;

"This is my brother, Yuuichi. He's a doctor, so we can get him to assess you to see the extent of the injuries."

I nodded, and Yuuichi motioned for me to go with him into another room. As I passed Kyouya, he gave Tamaki a strange look, and I felt myself go red. He must suspect something. He always did and nothing seemed to get past him.

Yuuichi shut the door behind us, and smiled at me. He looked so much gentler than Kyouya, and I told myself that it must be working as a doctor that's made him friendlier.

He turned to look at me, then tilted my head up into the light.

"There's a faded bruise on your left cheek" he noted, then turned my head to look at my other cheek.

"When was the last time your father hit you?" he asked.

"This morning, about nine…" I answered, and he nodded slightly.

"And where did he hit you?"

"The right side of my face" I answered again, trying to stop feeling my heart pounding a mile a minute.

He looked closer at my cheek, and tutted.

"That will bruise, and we'll have to take a picture to document it. Kyouya also mentioned that you got a cut from some china he threw at you?"

I nodded and extended my right arm, where a long pink scar was showing a couple inches from my elbow. He looked at it closely, and nodded.

"Okay, turn around please."

I turned slowly, and he stopped me.

"You have a lot of scratches on your legs-"

"Um, yeah, he threw a bottle at Tamaki and me earlier, and it shattered and hit all up my legs."

"Ah," he muttered, and then nodded for a moment. "Okay, you can go; I just wanted to do a basic assessment."

I walked back through to the other room and sat with Tamaki on the couch, while Yuuichi and Yoshio left the room to talk. Kyouya was watching me intently, and was also frowning deeply. Tamaki kept looking at me too, but it was Kyouya who took the breath to speak first.

"Why did you keep this from us?" he asked, looking slightly put out.

I just shrugged, and tried to push myself down into the cushions. I wanted the sofa to eat me, swallow me whole.

"Hanna. Please."

I looked up to see Tamaki's shining, sad eyes and felt guilty.

"I… you know I liked coming to Host Club…" I started, twining and locking my fingers together, then unlocking them and pulling them apart. "It was because you were all so much nicer than my father. I liked the kindness."

"How long has he been… violent?" Tamaki asked.

"Years… his business took a dive and he's not been the same since…" I stared off into space, trying to remember the last time he was genuinely nice to me, and I couldn't.

"I didn't want anyone to know. Then Katia found out last month and it's gone so fast."

I felt Tamaki cover my hand with his, and he squeezed t reassuringly.

Then Yuuichi and Yoshio came back into the room, and we all looked at them.

"Hanna, we think there will be enough evidence about your fathers' violence and domestic abuse; especially if your mother, yourself and Tamaki wish to make statements against him."

I heard Tamaki agree right away, and I nodded after a moments pause.

"I have informed the police, and they are on the way to take your father into custody. You will be able to return home tonight, unless you wish to make other plans" Yoshio said, then added "If you would like to stay here, we can have a room made for you?"

I smiled slightly and shook my head.

"Thank you sir, but I'd like to go and see my mother."

He nodded, and smiled.

"There will be a car ready for you shortly."

"Thank you sir."

* * *

Thanks guys, please don't hesitate to drop a review or something, they're always welcome :)


	20. Chapter 20

This is quite obviously a filler :) I decided to take my thumb from out my arse and get back to this one, I've been rather obsessed lately with Fable, a game for the Xbox with wonderful voice actors such as Stephen Fry, Jonathan Ross, Michael Fassbender, Simon Pegg, Zoe Wanamaker, Sir Ben Kingsley and Bernard Hill. I'm promoting Fable 3 here, but I love the whole series and this is completely irrelevant to Ouran, isn't it?

I do encourage you to check out my story if you want to, it's a little comfuzzling if you have no idea what the game is, but hey, it's something new right? :D

Unfortunately, due to my obsessions, I haven't been keeping on top of writing this fanfic, and I don't think I will be writing more any time soon... so I'm sorry but I don't know when I'll next post.

Nevertheless, please enjoy this short chapter, the angst and the heartwrenching sadness that comes with all of Hanna's sorry affairs. Chao!

* * *

Tamaki joined me in the car, and we arrived at my house about half an hour after my father had been arrested.

There was an officer stood at my door, who nodded us in, and I went right past the doors for the parlour by habit, and right up the stairs.

"Mum?" I shouted across the landing. There was no answer, and I went to her room and pushed the door open. She wasn't in there…

"Tamaki, is my mother down in the kitchen?" I shouted down to him, and he paused then pushed the door open and peered in.

"Not that I can see…"

I went down again and pushed open the parlour door, looking in and walked right through. She wasn't in here, and I continued walking into the office and then peered into the back yard.

"Are you sure she wasn't in her room?" Tamaki asked.

"I'm sure…"

I walked slowly back to the front door and looked at the police officer.

"Has my mother come home? About my height, green eyes and brown hair."

"I'm afraid not…" he answered, "I'll keep my eye out for her though."

"Okay, thank you."

I turned to Tamaki, who was looking increasingly concerned.

I dodged past him and ran right up to my mothers' room again, pushing through the doors and walking right into the room. Her bed was neatly made, and there right between the pillows, was a letter. I reached over to grab it, and opened it with shaking hands.

'Hanna.

I'm sorry, but I couldn't live with him any longer. I expect you to make your choice soon enough, but for now I know you're a stronger woman than I could ever be, and I know you'll do what sits right by you. I've left, and I don't expect I'll come back.

I love you.'

I re-read the note a couple times before it sank in.

"O-oh…" I gasped, dropping the note and then I was by her dresser, opening draws and doors just to see that she'd taken everything. She was gone.

I turned around to see Tamaki reading the note, looking appalled. Then his head snapped up, and he was looking at me sympathetically.

"Hanna-"

"Don't" I whispered, "just don't." I backed out of the room, stumbling along to my bedroom and bursting through the door. I didn't even reach my bed before I broke down crying hysterically, crumpling up into a ball on the floor.

I couldn't remember much then, except screaming it wasn't fair, and being moved.

Then I cried myself to sleep.


	21. Chapter 21

I realise this is appalingly short, but it's a wee update nontheless! Have fun reading and don't forget to leave a wee review... if you feel like it.

* * *

I tossed fitfully and tried to turn over, away from whatever was restricting me. I moved a little more, then realised I was in something that was itself moving.

I opened my eyes slowly to see I was in a car, with Tamaki wrapping his arms around me to keep me steady.

"What happened?" I asked quietly, rubbing my eyes.

"You cried…" he said quietly "for a while. Then you passed out."

"I passed out?"

"I think you're just tired," he soothed, pulling me close to him again and started running his fingers through my hair. "It's been a long day."

I nodded silently, resting my head on his chest.

"You're telling me…" I muttered, blinking back the tears.

He shushed me, rubbing his thumb under my eyes, to wipe away escapee tears. He looked just as tired, if not more, and I realised that though I was in some sad way used to the violent behaviour my father exhibited, whereas Tamaki was not. He looked much older than his seventeen years, and much more troubled than he should.

"I've arranged for you to stay at my house, there's a room being made for you, and I've cleared everything with Shima. She'll take good care of you."

I nodded mutely, not knowing nor caring much who Shima was.

I felt like I'd been abandoned. I felt hollow, and hurt, and scared…

I'd hidden the fact that my family had been broken for so long. So much so that it seemed my pretend world and the walls I'd built up were crumbling and falling down. My whole life was shattering before my eyes. It wasn't meant to be like this.

How long will I be able to carry on after just crying for a bit?

How long will I be able to hide the fact that I'm breaking?


	22. Chapter 22

So, I've just this second come to the final few chapters of my Fable fic, writing it that is, not posting it. This means that within the next few days I can start focusing solely on this fic, and I won't leave you waiting with crappy 621 word chapters... which this is if you minus my A/N.

Anyways, I'd like you to enjoy.

* * *

I was sat in a beige bedroom, and Tamaki had sent for some of my clothes to be brought so I could settle at his for a while.

To my surprise, one of the maids crept in and handed over a small stuffed cat. I'd left her under my pillow, and she flushed red when I looked at her, shock spread across my face.

"I looked under your pillows miss, in case there were night clothes there, and I found her…"

I just smiled at her, saying a small thank you, and she curtsied as she left.

I'd gotten the cat as an eleventh birthday present, off my parents before all of this started. It made me happy to cuddle the cat at night. I hugged her close to me, smiling happily.

Then I heard another knock at the door, and I looked up to see Tamaki peeking in.

"I wanted to check up on you" he said, striding in and sitting on my bed beside me.

"I'm doing fine, thank you" I said, pulling my knees up to my chest and looking at him.

We sat in awkward silence for a moment, until he grumbled something and grabbed at his hair.

"Listen, about earlier-" he started, and then stopped again. "I think its best we not talk about it… I mean, with you being here and all."

I nodded, hiding my mouth with my knees so he couldn't see me frowning. He seemed to sense it though, because he looked slightly more awkward and his brow furrowed.

"I'm a little confused at the moment" he whispered, rubbing the back of his neck "and besides, I don't think the rest of the hosts would be okay with me… being with someone."

I nodded again, and took a small breath.

"It's fine, I understand."

He smiled at me, and stood up again.

"Well… good! Dinner is at five tonight. I'll come back to take you down."

"Okay… and thank you Tamaki" I said, referring to taking me in.

"It's really no problem" he replied, bowing himself out.

Once I was sure he was gone, I moaned and threw myself back into the duvet.

"I can't believe it…" I muttered, wiping my tears away furiously.

What was all that about? He was confused? Was he confused about me? It reeled through my mind that he possibly just wanted to comfort me earlier, but surely a hug would have been better. He didn't have to kiss me if he was going to turn around and say he didn't want anything. I turned around and shoved my head into a pillow.

"MEN!"

* * *

Tamaki did come to get me for dinner, by which time I'd changed into a pair of jeans and a purple tee, he told me to just act as if this were my home, and if I wanted I could come down in slippers.

I did, and we walked down. He seemed considerably more relaxed than earlier, and was chattering away idly while I just about listened. He was letting me in on what was going on in club this week, but I couldn't really pay attention.

I'd gotten back to thinking about where my mother had gone to; and what would my dad be like when he got out of custody? How could I testify against the man who had given me life, but if I refused would my friends write me off as a lost cause?

I felt him lay a hand on my shoulder.

"It's going to be okay you know."

And I believed it would be, because there was a look in his eyes that was warm, and secure, and they were shining happily…

"I know."


	23. Chapter 23

Okay, here's another chapter :D

Far longer, far more description, far more effort. Boom, praise me, I'm bloomin' awesome.  
Joking of course, but yeah XD I am so, so, SO close to finishing Balverine Child (my Fable fic) and I'm so proud of it and if any of you have known me over the years I've pottered about on FF I always want to finish my fics and I'm hardly ever satisfied with the end result. But I am this time, and I'm betting most people reading through this have no idea what Fable is but I'd personally love it if you could check it out and see what you think :D I'll keep working on this fic though, I managed to bash out another 5 chapters for it last night in a fit of writing frenzy, so I just need to go over and edit them and then we'll all be hunky-dory.

As always, I hope you enjoy the chapter!

* * *

I'd practically forced myself to go into school on Monday. Tamaki had said that if it were him, then he'd have taken days off, and commended me on my bravery, and my ability to prise myself away from the warm linen sheets of my bed. It was hard, but I didn't want to be left alone, especially in a strange house with people I didn't know.

When we arrived at school it felt like all eyes were on me, and I felt myself reverting back into my 'shell'. My head was down, my hair covered my flushed cheeks, and I was wishing I'd stayed in the strange house with strange people. Tamaki was amazing though, he stuck by me through the halls, smiling and chattering on to me, trying to cheer me up. He was the only person willing to do so, it seemed. I could feel people staring at me, hear them whispering behind my back. Some people went as far as to back away from me or scurry away when I approached.

It was like I was diseased. A walking plague if you will... 'Get too close and you'll catch the broken family syndrome!'

I was growing ever more frustrated and angry with people's ignorance, because it wasn't like even half of them had decent respectable families. Most were children of mob bosses that bought them into the Academy, or their own families were imperfect. I had to bite the inside of my cheek continuously to stop myself screaming at people that I wasn't a freak show, that it wasn't my fault my family was so messed up. It was Tamaki that lost his nerve first though, to everyone's immense surprise.

We were walking past a group of four or five of the D class students, and as we walked past the tallest one – a boy about six foot, with a mess of greasy brown hair and wicked little eyes – whispered something to his friends and they all laughed and jeered in our direction. He stood up a little more straight, his sneer widening as he laughed cruelly.

"Suoh! I didn't know you hung around with scum like that! You're dragging yourself into a shit heap."

The halls were emptying, save the people who had heard the remark and turned with shocked expressions on their faces and eyes Tamaki and I to see how we'd react. Whereas I wanted to slide away and bury myself in the largest hole I could find, Tamaki flew past me, grabbing the guy by the lapels of his school blazer and shoved him roughly into the wall behind him, whilst sneering back equally as horribly.

"You dare say another word," he hissed menacingly, making the other guy cringe, "and I swear to God I will have your families business come crashing down... you're damn lucky Hanna is with me or I'd beat the living daylights out of you. Mark my words, you don't want a Suoh for an enemy."

I stood in shock, watching as Tamaki donned a completely fierce attitude, completely unlike him. He was threatening someone, which to be perfectly honest I'd seen him do in the Host Club. If one girl was being absolutely horrid to the others then he'd make some small remark with an apathetic air about him that would put the girl straight in seconds or else send her fleeing the room. But he'd never once used physical force, nor had he ever been as nasty as that. I don't think anybody other than myself and the D class student heard him, and others probably thought he was giving the guy a stern talking to. But the way the boys face drained of colour, the way a green tinge appeared at his neck and on his cheeks indicated that he felt more than physically sick, and he nodded quickly so Tamaki would drop him, and before anyone could register what was happening he was hurtling off to a bathroom.

"Hanna, let's go" he said, much more gently, and his face melted back into that polite little smile. I could only nod as he took my hand and steered me to class.

For the entirety of my lesson I couldn't pay attention – though my tutor didn't mind having known about what happened over the weekend. I sat in silent denial, as what I'd witnessed in the halls couldn't be the Tamaki Suoh I'd admired for the past year and a half. He'd never been angry and never hinted at violence, which made me shudder since I'd seen him act so terribly. I figured I didn't really know him at hall, and I was staying in someone's house who appeared as secretly violent as my father had been openly. But he kept such a calm demeanour... he was just a snake in the grass...

X X X

"Are you even sure?" Katia asked, just as shocked.

"Course I am! I was there" I said again, slightly annoyed that the fact Tamaki had pinned a guy against the wall wasn't sinking in for her. I highly doubt she'd believe it if she'd seen it with her own eyes. I was used to the fact that Club fanatics would turn a blind eye to these sorts of events but this just seemed a step too far. It wasn't concealing the gender and identity of Haruhi, it was a genuine threat made upon someone's person.

"But… but Tamaki isn't like that," she said, looking horrified at the very idea.

"Or he is but doesn't let on?"

"No, he isn't like that," she said firmly, looking irritated, "he was just sticking up for you."

"He could have said to back off, instead of threatening his family."

"I… that's true," she admitted after a moment, looking slightly defeated.

I felt sick. I'd told Katia everything, but she still stuck by saying that Tamaki was probably just trying to protect me. I was sceptical, but I decided to keep an eye on him for the rest of the week, to see how he would continue to act from here on in.

X X X

After three days I'd started to think about giving up on keeping an eye on Tamaki, as he was back to normal, and maybe Katia was right; maybe he had just been sticking up for me and I'd taken it the wrong way. I mean, the more I replayed the event of him shoving the D class student into the wall the more outrageous it seemed, and I was left thinking maybe I was over exaggerating this.

It was on the Friday evening that I noticed something was off.

We were on our way to his, but he was being unusually quiet and antisocial. He didn't seem like himself at all.

"Tamaki, how was club today?" I asked quietly, and he shifted his head awkwardly and shrugged.

"It was okay," he said, then bit his lip. "No, it wasn't… Kyouya closed early."

"Why?" I asked, "Did the twins do something?"

"No, I just didn't want to see anyone."

We both went quiet and I, for some reason, felt really bad for him. I shuffled over in the back of the car and wrapped my arm around him.

"It'll be okay. Whatever it is, it'll be okay."

He gave a small laugh, and let his head drop so it was resting on mine.

"I can't believe I mope over my problems when there are people like you with worse ones."

I blinked and scrunched my nose, thinking.

"Well… everyone has problems Tamaki."

"I know," he replied.

"It doesn't mean mine are any worse than yours, or anyone else's. We all have things to deal with, it's just life."

We were quiet again, but without warning he pulled me tighter against him and cuddled me.

"I feel bad for complaining to you," he whispered, and I heard his voice cracking. "But I miss my mother."

I felt something wet on the top of my head, and after he sniffled slightly, I realised he was crying, and my instinct reaction was to move his head to my shoulder and stroke his hair gently, something my mother always did.

"Me too."


	24. Chapter 24

Finished Balverine Child (my Fable fic, should anyone care lol) and now I am focusing solely on this. No one shots, no distractions, no nothing! Through My Eyes is my number one priority from here on in! So I hope you enjoy and review and such. Tatty bye~

* * *

After that incident Tamaki and I became as close as anyone could get without actually being a couple. He told me an awful lot about his family, and their situation.

I came to know the whole sorry tale where his mother and father had had an affair with one another when his father was married to another woman. I personally found that the least horrifying thing of this whole ordeal, as what Tamaki told me afterwards made me loathe another individual who could be the potential lifeline for... me. It turned out Tamaki was the product of that affair, and though his parents loved him, his grandmother did not approve.

She had told Tamaki about two years ago that he could make the choice between basically becoming disowned, or he could leave his mother in France and come to potentially be the heir to the Suoh Company. If he'd chosen to stay with his mother, who was in ill health, then his grandmother would have cut all the support money the company was giving, and his mother would have deteriorated until… well, it didn't bare thinking about.

So he'd left his mother in France, so she could continue to get the care she needed, but he wasn't allowed to contact her. So he hadn't spoken to his mother for a very long time. It was about this time of year he'd had to leave her too, and apparently it always made him a little homesick. I started to resent his grandmother from then on in, but Tamaki cheered up a little when he'd told me what was on his mind, and it made me feel happier knowing why he'd been so off the last week.

I'd been in my room one night, just as the holiday weekend started, doing my homework, when Tamaki burst in unannounced and bounded over smiling widely.

"Pack a bag, we're going on vacation!" he shouted, grabbing a duffle bag out of the closet and opening it on the bed.

"What? We're going now?" I asked, jumping up and feeling some sort of stupid panic set in.

"Yes, so pack some beach clothes, some sun glasses and a towel. We'll be leaving in two hours."

"Oh, okay," I muttered, feeling a bubble of panic swell in my stomach slightly. I'd never been on holiday with friends before and it had been years since I'd gone with my family. Not to mention I had no idea where we were going or what the weather was like there, and I only had a limited amount of time to get myself prepared in. Not to mention showering and doing my hair too. Ah, the woes of being a woman...

Tamaki, being ever prepared for any given situation and knowing exactly what he needed just pranced off, making me giggle slightly. Then I turned back to my wardrobe. I decided it would better to be safe than sorry, and as my mother had always said it's better to have something and not need it that need it and not have it, thus chose to just pull out a few pairs of shorts I had, and a few nice tees. I also grabbed a hoodie, a pair of flip flops, a towel from the bathroom and threw in my sunglasses. After them went three pairs of jeans and a few three quarter sleeve length tops and a wooly cardigan. I had no qualms about things matching and always had the notion that being comfortable was far better than being fashionable.

I'd gotten ready quicker than I'd expected to, so I spent time unpacking everything before repacking it neater. I was ready in no time, and went down to the hall waiting for Tamaki. He eventually came running down, grinning at me.

"Ready?" he asked, bounding up and bouncing on the spot.

"Yeah," I laughed, following him out at high speed to the large limousine that was waiting out front, jumping in to see the other hosts and a handful of guests already sat in there, drinking soda and eating sweets… probably provided by Honey.

The ride to the beach was long, but filled with laughs and jokes and long conversations about various different things.

It was fun, and I was surrounded by my friends and it was just... fun. I found I kept looking at Tamaki, and no one would ever think he was upset about anything the way he acted; smiling and happy and doing his absolute best to do what they could for everyone else.

He hid so much, and I reckon Kyouya knew about how he felt too, because he was so nice to him all the time… even when he was being annoying and loud. Sure, he'd sometimes get a telling off, but all things considered, that's not too terrible.

We eventually arrived, and when we piled out and I felt relief sweep over me. For a second I didn't know what it was, and I wanted to cry with happiness, and I realised it was because I was just away from all the crap back home, and it felt good. Lord it felt good.

"Are you coming Hanna?" Tamaki asked, taking hold of my hand and pulling me along gently. I nodded silently, and followed him, smiling weakly. Kyouya coughed loudly and we all turned to look at him.

"Well, the guests should be coming tomorrow, so I suggest tonight we go to bed early and stay fresh and pretty for them all, yes?"

There was a mumbled agreement, and I turned to get my bag to see Mori had already scooped up all the bags with staggering ease and was walking off to the holiday home.


	25. Chapter 25

Another chapter :) I'm working on it guys, there should be a lot more coming up

* * *

The sun had barely had chance to peak over the horizen that following morning when I was bomboarded by two overexcited red headed twins. They informed me that everyone was grabbing breakfast then heading down to the beach to hang out there for the day. I was urged by Hikaru and Kaoru to join them since there was nothing else to do, and for twenty minutes they went through the contents of my back and criticised every item of clothing I owned.

They thre my stuff to the side, and Hikaru pulled something out of his pocket to show me. They tried to force me to wear this two piece swimsuit they'd presented me with, but seeing as it mainly consisted of strings I refused profusely and insisted on wearing my own swimsuit that was just a plain black, so I didn't stand out against the other girls.

Of course, seeing this was the twins I was dealing with they threatened not to leave me alone unless they could accessorise me.

So I put my swimming costume on, and the twins had dashed off to grab some things for me. Kaoru came back with a long silken top. I put it on and it came to about my mid thighs, hanging losely off me to allow a cool breeze. It was mostly see through but since I was wearing my costume I didn't bother with that. I was given then a pair of large framed sunglasses with the same snack print pattern around the frame. Hikaru came in then and threw me a pair of flip flops that matched the whole attire, and then placed a large white straw sun hat on my head with that same silvery pattern showing up on the long ribbon around the rim of the hat.

"You look fabulous!" Hikaru gushed when the look was complete, adding a fake falsetto lisp to his speech and standing with his hand on his hip. I giggled sheepishly as Kaoru gave me the thumbs up and we all linked arms to go outside. It didn't take them long to rush me down to the beach and into the bright sunlight, then they shoved me under a parasol with Kyouya.

I took a moment to straighten the top out, smoothing it down before pulling my knees up to my chest and wrapping my arms around them, holding them there. Kyouya was watching me, a bemused expression on his face before he took a breath.

"You're not going to socialise?"

I shook my head 'no', and stared out to where everyone was playing in the sand. I could see Amelia and Leah jumping on the twins' backs and making them race across the sand, Kiki and Katia were making sandcastles with Mori and Honey, along with a handful of other girls. The girl with black hair and black eyes whom Kyouya had picked was sat beside me reading an English copy of 'Wuthering Heights', smiling slightly as she flicked the page over. She sensed me looking at her and glanced upwards, her dark eyes scanning over me before she cracked a smile and said in a surprisingly melodious voice;

"Sansa Parks, pleasure."

I shook her hand and noted that her accent was different to ours, her name foreign, and I picked up by the fact that the text she was reading was in another language, she was either English or American.

I looked up again, away from Sansa, and watched Haruhi picking up shellfish across the beach with the curly blond haired girl who I'd learned was called Alicia. She, I knew, was American. Timid, shy, spoke very little Japanese and I had found out off Katia that Haruhi picked her knowing what it was like to be the new kid, and rather an outsider. I thought that was very sweet.

"Do you fancy a game of volleyball Hanna?" Sansa asked me, and I paused before smiling back and nodding.

"Yes, I'd like that. Kyouya, you coming too?"

"Not in this lifetime," he muttered, picking up the discarded book Sansa had been reading and flicking through the pages before going back to the beginning.

We took off our flip flops, chucked our shirts in a pile rather unceremoniously and I took my hat off and placed it down. However I kept the sunglasses on to stop the white sand glaring the sun back up at me.

It started with Sansa and I batting the volleyball back and forth to one another over a net, when suddenly the twins joined in with Leah and Amelia close on their heels, Mori, Honey, Kiki and Katia all watched, cheering us on while a small crowd gathered around as spectators.

Hikaru hit the ball to our side of the net, and though Kaoru got to it first, he clipped it and it went the wrong way, flying right over to the left instead of going forward. I took a few steps back to ready myself, and as it came towards me I jumped to hit it. I miscalculated and realised before it reached me that I hadn't managed to jump high enough. I felt someone scoop me up and I punched the ball down, scoring my team a point while I looked down to see a gleeful Tamaki holding me around the waist.

It carried on like that, and soon enough there weren't any rules, people were just running, hitting the ball, colliding with other people and laughing hysterically. The game had to end when Honey misjudged a jump and landed in the net, falling to the floor with a gentle thud, and waiting patiently while people chuckled around him for Mori to untangle him from the net.

"Fun game," Sansa panted, as Katia wrapped her arm around my lower back and grinned.

"It was! Except I think I'm gonna bruise," Katia huffed, extending her arm where she'd already started developing a yellow mark. "But sod my peach like skin, let's go for a walk!"


	26. Chapter 26

Another chapter for my wonderful readers. I'm currently writing for this but I've hit ANOTHER writers block wall and it's stumped me. I'll try to get myself out this rut, but in the meantime I have a few chapters to keep you all sated :) enjoy!

* * *

I'd gone to grab my hat to keep the sun out a bit, and told Sansa and Katia I'd be right with them. They'd gone forward to climb up a hill and I was chased after them, my feet kicking the sand up as I pelted after them. They were only about five minutes ahead up the hill when I saw two guys go chasing up after them.

I stopped in my tracks, looking up at the two guys. They looked a bit dodgy, and I watched with morbid curiosity asone threw a can down the hill. It seemed to go in slow motion, clattering down against rocks until it rolled to a halt at my feet. Tilting my head I read the label and I could see that it was a beer can, and I instantly felt my stomach knot anxiously. I couldn't run for help, because by the time I had something terrible could have happened to Sansa and Katia, but if I went up there I wouldn't be an awful lot of help either.

I went to take a step forward anyway, going to hurry to do whatever I could, when I felt someone wrap their arm around my waist, and clamp their other hand over my mouth.

"Not so fast," they slurred as I tried to jolt away, my screams for help muffled by the hand. It was a voice I swore I could recognise, and I felt my body go tense and bile rise in my throat.

There were screams from up ahead, and whoever it was that had hold of me wrenched me back into the bushes, hiding from sight as Mori and Tamaki went pelting past, Hikaru, Kaoru and Kyouya right behind them. I tried to scream for them, but it only came out as a weak muffled cry, and tears stung my eyes as he dragged me further away from my friends and down the hill to the car park.

His breath stank, and he was breathing heavily right in my ear as he dragged me kicking and screaming to his car.

"Shush baby girl, it's ok," he muttered again, hot tears escaping my eyes and blinding my vision. They pushed me into the car and got in after me, and I wiped my eyes furiously to see my father looking rough as ever, drinking vodka straight from a bottle. He looked strangely serene though, and considered me for a moment before starting to talk.

"You… you set the police after me," he started, tripping over his words slightly then taking another swig from the bottle. "They let me out on bail…"

I thought then he was angry, and he was about to lay into me like he had done so many times with my mother. I'd tensed up instinctively, but he looked at me curiously, his gaze unfocused as he did so, and he took another swig from his bottle. I could only open my mouth and trust myself not to be sick.

"I see," I choked, feeling the bile rise higher in my mouth, acidic and burning.

"Your mothers' gone," he added, not looking pleased, but not angry. It was more unsettling than him being violent. I wanted to run away as quickly as possible. He seemed to sense that and lay a hand on my knee, patting it gently.

"I'm not here to hurt you Hanna… I've done enough of that," He said, surprisingly soberly, before he passed the bottle over to me. He'd not even had a quarter, and when I tentatively offered it him back, he shook his head. He'd not given away alcohol or refused it for years. If I'd ever picked a bottle up at home and he hadn't told me to he'd have flown off the handle.

"I've lost my family," he said, "I've lost my job… I've lost my dignity. And it's all because of that," he waved his hand at the alcohol.

I geniunely had no idea what to say to him. He looked like a broken man, and I could tell that he actually was. But I had no sympathy for him at all. Because of him my life had been a living hell for the past few years; I hadn't been eating properly in fear he'd find me in the kitchen and beat me, I'd had to keep secrets from my friends, I'd judged all men to volatile and cruel people. Because of him I'd not been able to trust people, my schoolwork had been slipping and perhaps worst of all I'd lost my parents through his mindless self pity. My mum had left to God only knows where and he'd soon be goind to jail. Probably sooner rather than later since I was almost sure he was breaking his parole.

"Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?" I whispered, confused. "Do you think you're the only one who's been – been messed up by this?"

He looked perplexed, and I turned and looked out to the hill, where everyone was silhouetted in the setting sun. They were running back and forth frantically. I found myself inclined to imagine they'd realised I'd been missing. It was a nice thought.

"I know I've messed things up for you-"

"No, you don't. Why did you come here?" I asked sharply, cutting over him.

"I needed to apologize. I am sorry."

"You've said that before," I snapped, turning my head away sharply and looking back up to the hill, where Tamaki was stood alone looking out, Kyouya by his side probably trying to calm him. Tamaki was shaking his fists and grabbing at his hair… "You never did change dad. If you were sorry you would have."

I looked back at him now, and his eyes were wet with tears, and he looked completely admonished. Ashamed of himself for once in his life. I thrust the vodka back into his hands and I felt my lip curl up in a sneer.

"You've had your chance and you ruined it. I don't know if I want to see you again, and if I do I'll find you. Don't come looking for me."

I flung the car door open and got out, slamming it roughly shut behind me with as much power and anger as I could muster to try and put my point across. I felt my chest swell with pride and self satisfaction as I drank in the thought that I'd actually managed to stand up to him for the first time in years without feelign like someone else was helping me do so. I held my chin up high and marched back to the main path. It was only when Tamaki saw me coming and races down to me that I felt myself deflate a little, and actually take in what had happened.

I'd just basically ran out on my dad, leaving him when he needed me the most. I'd let all of my frustration out on him and though in all honesty he deserved nothing less it made me tear up thinking about how upset he was. Tamaki met me there, scooping me up into his arms and hugging me close. I couldn't explain what had just happened and my tearful reaction to his questions made him instinctively jump to the worst, especially when he saw the car speeding out of the parking lot and down the road. I tried my best to shut him up by hushing him, but it was only when Kyouya told him that the registration of the car indicated that it belonged to my dad did he actually stop his rambling. Only then did he actually look at me with fear and pity in his eyes and hug me, whispering that it would be okay.

It was then that I busrt out crying, that my sobs shook me so violently that he had to hold me close and lower us both carefully to the grassy ground. I was curled up in his lap, clinging to his shirt as he cradled me, held me securely and acted as my only means of safety while I sobbed my heart out, shushing me and whispering comforting words against my hair.

* * *

Tamaki had carried me back to the house while I'd worn myself out crying. Kyouya had found a small lounge and we'd gone in there, Tamaki taking a sofa and sitting me on his lap again. He'd tried distracting me from my crying, telling me about how one of those other guys had stalked Katia and Sansa up the hill, Haruhi had tried sticking up for them and then been thrown off into the water, and he'd had to jump in after her. He'd tried asking me what had happened to me, got very worked up at one point because nobody had seen me go and I'd been gone for a good twenty minutes. He knew it was my father, but he didn't know what had transpired in those twenty minutes I'd been gone, and he was flapping about until I had to shush him.

I'd laughed at the fact that I'd had to reverse the roles like that, while Tamaki stared on in confusion, while Kyouya stood to the side, looking slightly concerned.

"She's hysterical," he said after a moment, which made me laugh more.

"N- no I'm not," I said, my voice low and breathy as I tried to get my breathing under control properly. It took another ten minutes and meanwhile all the hosts had gathered and were staring at me with identical worried looks on their faces. I sighed and smiled slightly. "It was my dad. They let him out on bail and he came to see me to apologise."

I felt myself bump to the floor as Tamaki and Kyouya flew into fits of rage, shouting that he shouldn't have been let out at all, and how could I not have screamed for help. Mori looked unsettled, as did Honey and Haruhi, and though the twins looked angry they stayed silent, quietly observing me as I composed myself. I let them rant on, before putting up my hands to stop them.

"He put his hand over my mouth to stop me screaming. But he didn't hurt me. He said he was sorry, and said he was getting off the drink…"

"And?" Kyouya sniped, looking very pissed off.

"And I told him I didn't care. I told him I didn't want him in my life."

Tamaki smiled slightly at that, then stooped down to pick me up, pulling me close into his chest and resting his cheek upon my head. I wrapped my arms tentatively around him, trying to stop myself from blushing madly.

"I'm happy for you," he said quietly, his breath hot on my ear.

"I'm not sure I am though…"


	27. Chapter 27

Another chapter today since I'm feeling rather generous :) I'd love it if you could review, pretty please? :3

* * *

I declined the offer to join the hosts and guests in the large dining room for dinner, and instead stayed in my room as I didn't have an appetite. I'd pulled out the notebook Tamaki had gotten me to help with my maths and I was working through surds and quadratic equations. After struggling through half a page, there was a sharp knock on my bedroom door and I looked up slowly. Whoever it was, they knocked again a lot louder – and seemingly more urgently – than before.

I got up quickly and raced over to the door, opening it to see who was there. It was a girl I hardly recognised, with shoulder length brown hair, dark brown eyes and a sour expression on her face. She obviously looked annoyed, and was scowling at me, her arms folded in front of her chest as she looked me up and down.

"Hanna…" she muttered, tossing her hair back with a sharp flick of her head. "We don't like you."

I paused, completely thrown over at the fact that she'd been so honestly blunt about it. In a way I felt nothing but complete and utter respect for her sheer brass balls. On the other hand, there was the smallest, iota sized part of me that wanted to floor her. Peering past her and out into the corridor, there was three more girls there with their arms crossed in a similar fashion. Each of them had a scowl on their face, and were glaring at me. I felt myself deflating a little inside then, realising that I was outnumbered four to one and even if I slammed my door then and there they'd probably barge through it before I could lock the damn thing. I had no chance of holding them out, I was as weak as a baby carrot...

And I didn't even have a chance to ask why she held such animosity for me before she started explaining.

"You spend loads of time with the hosts, they like you because you act like this troubled little girl they think they can fix… but you're a bitch, and you better stay away from Tamaki, or else."

I stared blankly at her, before my brain snapped back into gear and I cocked my head at her.

"Or else what?"

I wanted to slap myself. I'm doomed and some smart ass part of my brain decided to challenge them and piss them off more than they were probably already. It was stupid. I started phasing out to imagine them jumping on me almost comically when she coughed a little, annoyance hinted there.

But she just looked stumped and annoyed, and her arms dropped down to her sides. It was almost as if she hadn't expected me to retaliate. Then her friends walked up beside her and her snotty attitude returned, and she quickly shoved me in the chest, pushing me back.

"We'll humiliate you," she sneered.

She stepped into my room and shoved me again, this time making me trip over the edge of the rug and fall backwards, landing with a thud on the floor.

"Hey-!" I started to yell, but one of the other girls dived on me, her elbows catching me in the stomach and winding me, before her other friends grabbed hold of me, stuffing one of my cleans pairs of balled up socks in my mouth before smirking cruelly down at me.

* * *

I pulled at the binds on my wrist, trying to free myself. They'd used the silk scarves they had around their necks to tie my hands together and then tie me to the bed, then they'd used more scarves to tie my feet down in a similar fashion. It was like some sick bondage session... my face was beetroot red with embarrassment and I wished, wished, wished my bed would just come alive and eat me to save me the trouble of launching myself dramatically from the roof in a femme fatale, overly cheesy, Bond movie-esque way.

I'd been written over in lipstick, words like 'bitch', 'slut' and 'whore'. They'd poured nail polish over me, staining my clothed and leaving such a strong and rancid stench around that I was having trouble suppressing my gagging reflex. The socks in my mouth weren't helping, and I was using my tongue to try and push them out, ignoring the sickening feel of fluff over my tongue and an extremely dry mouth.

They'd pulled out all my clothes from the dresser and gone through everything that was nice and torn it up. The most heartbreaking thing was the fact that they'd found my teddy cat, and taken her. I could only hope they didn't destroy it… it was all I had off my mother. I knew the tears were there before they streaked down my face, and humiliation washed over me quickly, just as they'd promised.

The worst part of it was the knock at the door.

"Hanna, are you sure you're not hungry?" Kyouya called, knocking at the door. "Tamaki sent me to ask."

I wanted to shout that I was fine, but I panic and bile rose in my throat, and I felt suddenly that I was suffocating. My chest started heaving quickly and tears flowed quickly as I started to cry in earnest.

"I know your father showing up today was a… surprise…" he said, sounded a little irritated. "But that's no reason for you not to eat."

The door handle jiggled slightly. Half of me wanted him to leave, I didn't want to be seen like this, but I could feel my throat closing in a panic attack, I was struggling, my vision blurring. I needed him to come in.

"Right, Hanna you-" Kyouya said, coming in looking at a sign in his hand that said 'do not disturb' before glancing upwards to see me bound and gagged, graffiti'd and crying while slowly and horribly losing consciousness.

In an instant he'd dropped the sign and ran over to the bed. He looked wild eyes for an instant as he ripped the socks from my mouth. Taking a deep shuddering breath, I choked and coughed while I tried to gulp down as much air as I could again. I turned my head and breathed, shaking, watching as Kyouya sank to his knees beside the bed, pale as a sheet.

"Could you untie me?" I croaked, and his eyes snapped up to meet mine, before he nodded hastily and let my hands loose, then my feet. Finally able to sit up, I rubbed my wrists where they'd chaffed as I'd pulled at my restraints, watching Kyouya stride about the room, picking up my shredded clothing before letting the shreds slip through his fingers and fall to the floor like ribbons. He turned around, back to me, his brow knotted in confusion, and anger.

"I don't understand," he said, motioning to the room and then looking at me.

"It was a bit of banter," I muttered, glancing down at the rags on the floor.

"Ban- Hanna, whoever this was they bound and gagged you, cut your clothes up and wrote obscenities over you!"

I couldn't argue with that… trying to blow it off and expect Kyouya to accept that was a long shot; I knew he'd see right through me. Anyone would have to be honest. What I never expected was for him to go into my bathroom and fetch a warm wet wash cloth, and gently start rubbing the lipstick graffiti off my face and arms. When my skin was clean of the foul words, he told me to wait for a few minutes and he'd be back.

I sat on my bed wringing my hands while I waited, and about five minutes later a knock sounded on the door and he came back in. In his arms were a bundle of clothes, and he laid them next to me on the bed before standing up and sighing slightly.

"There's nail polish in your hair, which you'll probably need help getting out. Then you're going to need a shower to get rid of the smell, otherwise you'll raise suspicion."

I nodded silently, then glanced at his clothing that he'd brought for me; a pair of dark black elastic shorts, a white t-shirt and an overly large purple, white and black checked shirt.

"People will suspect a lot if I wear your clothing."

"I know, but given the fact that you have no clothes left in tact, there's nothing else we can do."

I nodded my head silently, then stood to go to the shower. Kyouya followed me, and in silence he washed my hair for me, picking out all the nail polish and making sure it was completely clean. I could feel my cheeks and ears burning in embarrassment as he tangled his fingers in my hair. I could feel some kind of happiness bubbling up in my stomach – something reminiscent of when I was a hard core Host Club fan, but I felt guilt clutching at my heart and I couldn't help but wish he'd hurry up.

When he switched the shower head off, I reached up and wringed my hair out, before grabbing a bobble from the sink and tying my hair up into a clumsy bun.

"I'm going to get a shower now," I said quietly, twisting my fingers together and trying to stop blushing as he regarded me slowly.

"I'll leave you to it then," he smiled, pressing a large white fluffy towel into my hands and bowing himself out of the door.

My heart fluttered and I sat down on the floor in a daze as I tried to regain control over my frantic breathing. It was horrible that the boys in the host club had this kind of control over me. The fact that they could make my heart skip a beat or leave me breathless was stupid, and I hated myself for it.

I turned the shower back on and stripped down naked, ready to climb in. I soaped up and washed all the mess off me, leaving my skin smelling like vanilla. I hummed idly to myself as I did so, forgetting everything that was bothering me.

After half an hour, I climbed out again, wrapped the towel around my body securely, and pushed the bathroom door open to look back into my room.


	28. Chapter 28

This'll be the last chapter for a while guys, I need to be writing a lot more but I don't have the time. My grandparents are preparing for an Xmas market in Belfast and I'm making the stock for them in most of my spare time. So it's just busy busy busy.

As always, a review would be welcome :D

* * *

I was stood in the room, which seemed to stretch out horribly and morph into something akin to a horror film before my eyes. It was probably because I was naked beneath my towel, my bra and panties in hand so I could put them back on, and Kyouya was still in my room, changing my bed. A huge part of me wanted to adopt the womanly instincts that seem to be suddenly instilled in my blood which would have forced me to scream for him to get out, and the usual flight instinct was jumping through my bones, urging me to run back into the bathroom and force myself down the plughole.

He looked up at me, and smiled coyly before gesturing to the room.

He'd changed the bedding and moved all the destroyed clothing into an orderly pile in the corner of the room, laid the clothing he was lending me out onto the bed in a neatly folded pile and brought more towels because the ones I had now had some left over nail polish and lipstick wiped on them in patches.

"I tidied up for you," he pointed out, captain obvious for once. But he seemed so proud of himself for actually doing some tedious task he'd usually get a maid to do, that my previous urge to run screaming from him dissipated and I was left hunching my shoulders, feeling the chill nip at my toes.

I nodded silently, and tried to subtly move my underwear out of view behind my back so he couldn't see what I was holding despite the fact that he probably already knew what it was.

He took note of my shyness and left without uttering another word, brushing past me on his way out of the room, smiling politely all the while. Once the door clicked shut behind him I let out a sigh and threw myself face down on the bed, screaming into a pillow. The sound was muffled and no one would hear me…

"Why me?" I asked to no one in particular, and I lay there for a few minutes feeling sorry for myself.

I don't know why I hadn't told Kyouya who the girls were… I suppose it was because I didn't know their names, but I could have at least pointed them out. And how was I supposed to get my teddy back now? I swallowed the lump in my throat and rolled over onto my back, thinking for the first time since this afternoon about my father, and the way he'd found me to try to apologize. How he'd not been angry or abusive and instead been sorrowful and rather gentle about the whole thing.

Twenty minutes of regret didn't make up for years of abuse though.

Getting up, I dried myself on and pulled on my underwear, slipping into the shorts Kyouya left and pulling the strings a little tighter so they didn't fall down. I tugged the t-shirt on over my head and then pulled on the checked shirt, leaving it open at the front as a kind of jacket. I slipped on my last remaining pair of sandals (that had thankfully been hidden under my bed out of sight during the girls' selfish mission to destroy every item I owned), black too, and then left my room with my hair still wet and straggly down my back.

It would be just my luck that I'd happen to turn the exact corner I did to find myself staring at those same four girls who'd not an hour ago terrorized me, batting their eyes at Tamaki. Without a word or so much as a breath I whipped around to retrace my steps to go into hiding in my room. But I wasn't quick enough, and I heard the high shrill voice call me back.

"Hanna, what _are_ you wearing?" the girl with shoulder length brown hair squealed, looking me up and down with a burning loathing in her eyes.

I turned around and bit my lip, trying to think of a reasonable excuse for wearing boys clothing, but couldn't find one. There wasn't one if I was being perfectly honest. Tamaki was looking completely perplexed staring at the clothing I was wearing

"Are you wearing Kyouya's clothes?" he asked me, and I shrunk back slightly, biting my lip.

"There was a bit of a mishap with her own clothing, so I let her borrow mine as a last resort," Kyouya said, as he walked up behind Tamaki and stood beside him. He looked to me then at the girls who'd surrounded Tamaki and a knowing glint shone from his eyes. He might have seen the look on my face or the hatred on the faces of those girls, but I couldn't be sure.

"What… what happened with your clothes?" Tamaki asked in disbelief.

"I'll explain later. Ladies could you please leave up for a while? I need to talk to Tamaki and Hanna privately."

"Sure Kyouya," the brunette chirped, smiling widely, before turning to Tamaki while batting her eyelids "I'll see you later, okay Tamaki?"

"Of course princess, I'll see you all later," he smiled, and they skipped off, but not before shooting me a warning look.

I sucked in my breath and waited a moment, letting Tamaki and Kyouya slowly turn their attention towards me. Tamaki looked confused, while Kyouya had an angrier look on his face.

"Was it them?" he asked me, and Tamaki snapped his eyes to Kyouya, before letting them flick back to me.

"No, we just generally don't get along," I said smoothly, smiling bitterly. Kyouya hummed slightly to himself, obviously sceptical. He knew it was them, I didn't even have to consider the possibility, and Tamaki just continued to stare at me as Kyouya started to explain the whole situation about my clothes and being written over and having nail polish poured over me.

Kyouya barely got to finish before Tamaki was seething. He started muttering rapidly in French, and Kyouya nodded along – obviously able to speak French and keep up with him.

I however was limited to Japanese, so quickly grew tired of being gestured towards while Tamaki grew angrier with everything that had happened. I decided I'd had enough and turned around to leave, walking back the way I'd come down the hall to the stairs that would get me to the front door.

"Hanna!" Tamaki shouted, and I turned around at the bottom of the stairs to see him barrelling down towards me. "Where are you going?" he asked me breathlessly, and I shrugged slightly.

"I don't know, I just fancy going for a walk."

He paused and bit his lip, looking out the window at the rain falling in torrents and he looked back at me, biting the inside of his cheek.

"It's raining," he muttered, and I smiled in spite of myself. He smiled slightly too, before reaching forward and taking hold of my hand, leading me back upstairs, but to the top floor.

The thunder was cracking all around, seemingly louder than the rest of the house, and the lightning flashed, illuminating the room he led me into.

There were two large plush chairs and a small round table with two large glasses and a crystal pitcher of water on top, the ice clinking away in the glass and the water droplets caused by condensation running down the outer side of the pitcher to leave a small puddle on the wooden surface of the table.

Enough light streamed through the window to light the place up, and as Tamaki gestured for me to sit down in one of the chairs I looked up at him, feeling my stomach flutter slightly as his violet eyes lit up a hundred times brighter than I'd ever see before. Only one side of his face was in the light, and the other half was in the shadow as he leaned over me, his mouth curved upwards, lips slightly parted. I stared at them, enthralled, until he moved away and sat in the other chair.

He'd obviously had this set up for a short while and it clicked that he was only around the corner from my room where I found him and those absolute cows because he must have been coming to get me. The thought struck me then that it could have been Tamaki who stumbled upon me in my vulnerable position. Would he have reacted so calmly, or would he have gone into a panic and fussed over me?

"How are you after today?" he asked quietly, snapping me back to reality, and I couldn't help but note how he'd moved his face completely into the shadow. I could still see his violet eyes glinting at me though, almost like cats' eyes. His voice had dropped almost an octave, sounding much more serious and adult, huskier and… seductive?

I could feel myself reading into this too much.

"I'm okay… considering everything," I said feeling my ears burn. I cast my eyes downwards and stared at my hands, watching myself twist my fingers together. Tamaki was very quiet, and then he sighed.

"We have a small situation," he started, and I glanced up quickly – ignoring the way my neck cracked – and looked into those glowing eyes. "My grandmother found out that you're staying with me, and she said she'd like to meet you before she allows us to continue with it."

I felt my heart clench. I didn't want to say anything to upset Tamaki, but it was a well known fact that his grandmother, the president of the Suoh Corporation, was a mean old woman. She ruled with an iron fist and hated anyone that seemed below her. My father had done business with her in the past few years and came home often enough in a drunken stupor shouting about how she was a 'bitter old bitch' before he stormed over to the liquor cabinet and I'd fled the room.

If his grandmother knew my father and about his temperament, then it would be unlikely she'd take to me.

"When would she like me to see her?" I found myself asking, sitting straighter and more rigidly, holding my chin up high.

He smiled slightly, warm and relaxed.

"Whenever you're ready. She says you've had a lot to deal with and she'll meet you on even ground."

"Even ground… when it's good for us both?"

"Yes, but obviously some time in the near future, as she's talking about you staying in the long run."

I nodded and smiled, when suddenly the lights flickered on and illuminated the room, blinding me for a second before I could squint my eyes and see Tamaki properly in the bright light.

He was smiling at me.


	29. Chapter 29

Another chapter :) We'll have made it to 50 reviews by my next update! We're doing well guys!

* * *

Before breakfast the morning after Tamaki told me I had to meet his grandmother at some point I was coaxed into some of Haruhi's clothing. Kyouya's clothes – though not at all large by any account – were too big for me. It felt strange sitting in the dining room with everyone else wearing Haruhi's clothes, though I hadn't really had a choice in the matter as I couldn't really stroll into the room in my underwear. I suppose a plus side could be that nobody had seen Haruhi in this dress.

It was a long cotton white dress with many layers. It should have been more floaty, but I supposed as I was taller it had to accommodate me and was tighter around my bust,. making it seem more pronounced, and the dress came only to my mid thigh and not my calves as intended to be. Honey was sat opposite me, and was smiling at me.

Though Honey seemed to approve of my look, I got very many strange looks from other people, including some of the hosts. Hikaru and Kaoru walked in when I was half way through my corn flakes and gawped at me before falling over a side table holding an array of breads (croissants, bread rolls, so on, so forth) and they knocked the lot everywhere. Kyouya was quick to jump on them and berate them for not paying attention to what they were doing, and by doing that he managed to take most of the attention away from me and my look, which I believe was what he intended to do in the first place.

It was only when the girls from last night walked in and started smirking at me that I felt my temper start boiling up. The even had the nerve to sit right next to me, flanking me on both sides and getting far too close for comfort.

"I'm surprised you're even showing your face around here," the girl with brown hair hissed into my ear as she reached over for orange juice.

"You expect me to starve?" I muttered back, keeping my eyes on my toast as I started to butter it.

"I'd rather you did, you whore. I bet you're sleeping with Kyouya. Why else would he give you his clothes?"

I ignored this comment and instead put my knife down (suppressing the urge to stab her in the eye with it) and turned to her very calmly, smiling slightly.

"What's your name?"

"Excuse me?" she snapped, crossing her arms and leaning back into the chair, fixing an icy glare on me.

"Your name, what is it?" I repeated, smiling wider and propping my chin up on my arm.

"Mana," she muttered back to me, looking confused.

I took a breath and could feel something in me swelling, some sense of relief that I just couldn't wait to have wash over me. Something niggled in the back of my mind, screaming that I was about to be as bitchy as I used to be before I quit the club.

"Well Mana, could you please stop being a complete and utter bitch to me? I'm guessing you probably have a massive crush on Tamaki and the fact that I'm close to him just vexes you so, but let's be adults here. I think it's high time you grow up and act your age instead of your shoe size."

Her friends looked shell shocked, as did Honey and Mori who heard every word and had heard the exchange between us before that. Mana herself looked completely affronted and as if she was about to explode. I cut her off before her tirade could begin, in a very low, quiet and calm voice.

"I'll let you into a secret that only you seem unaware of. Tamaki is a nice guy, and as long as a person is going to be horrible then he won't be interested. If you stop being horrible to people, cutting their clothes up and dumping nail polish on them, then you won't have a problem."

I turned away from her at that point and started back on my toast, and could almost sense her deflating as she took in what I had said. She and her group sat in silence and regarded one another wearily, until I'd finished with my toast and stood up to move away. I felt eyes following me and passed Kyouya with a small smirk on my face. He'd put two and two together a long time ago and Kaoru caught up with me not two minutes after I'd left the dining room, tellign me that Kyouya had sent the girls packing early, shipping them off home before the rest of us and banning them from club.

My cat teddy was on my pillow before I even got to my room.

* * *

We all went out for a final swim that afternoon, but there was more focus on sun bathing and socialising than there was actually swimming. At about two a lot of girls started going up to their rooms to pack their clothes, but I stayed sprawled out on my beach towel since I only had one set of clothes and they belonged to Haruhi.

I smiled slightly as the sun shone down on me, warming me up and making my toes tingle. I buried them in the sand and snuggled myself down to take a nap when I felt everything cool suddenly and the pinkish glow I could see from inside my eyelids turned black. I knew someone was stood over me. Cracking my eyes open slightly and squinting up to see the sun glinting off bright blond hair, violet eyes gleaming from the silhouette or Tamaki.

"Any reason you're blocking the sun?" I yawned, smiling nontheless, pushing myself up onto my elbows and brushing my hair back with my hand.

"Just wondering if you're ok, after what happened last night and all."

"I'm fine Tamaki," I said with a small smile, sitting up properly as he sat down next to me, crossing his legs and leaning forward resting on his knuckles in the sand. I glanced around quickly and saw that while I'd had my eyes closed the rest of the hosts had also left the beach. He was quiet for a minute then he took a breath and looked me in the eyes.

"Do you think you could meet my father as well?" he asked quietly, and though a little shocked by the request I smiled and nodded a yes.

"Any reason you're asking?" I asked him, leaning forward a little and resting my weight on my arms, sinking slightly into the sand.

Tamaki smiled a little, shook his head and tracked his violet eyes up to meet my green ones. I felt my stomach clench and my head spin and I felt something that I hadn't felt before. It was frightening, new, but made me feel so elated and happy at the same time.

I felt confused, and even more so when I felt a gentle pressure on my hand, and I looked down to see Tamaki's fingers curled around mine. I looked up again, feeling my eyes open wide and my mouth opened slightly in shock. I managed to compose myself after a second and closed my mouth abruptly, wondering what on Earth was going on.

Tamaki didn't say a word, but seemed to shake himself out of whatever state he was in, standing up and pulling me up with him, though I wasn't expecting it. There was a rushing sound in my ears, my feet weren't quite holding me up, and then his arms were around me, and his lips oh so close to mine yet again, and then I felt them. Soft and gentle, and pressed against mine when they really, really shouldn't have been...


	30. Chapter 30

So another short chapter, sorry about that everyone :p

Thanks for reading, and I hope you review for me... please :3

* * *

Something in me twigged, and I yanked myself away from Tamaki with a jolt, stumbling backwards and standing up properly. My calves were burning, my heart was pounding and my brain was screaming at me because I'd turned down a kiss from Tamaki. But I didn't know why he'd tried that, or what intentions he had, so I just shook my head at his shocked, dejected face and ran back to the mansion.

* * *

As soon as we arrived back at Tamaki's, the two of us sharing an awkward silence, I grabbed my stuff and ran up to my room, locking it quickly and throwing my stuff down before dropping to my knees on the floor and then drooping over to the side to lie on the soft cool carpet. I could hear his footsteps coming quickly down the corridor, and he tried at the door before realising it was locked.

"Hanna, can I talk to you?" he called, but I pulled my jacket over my head and blanked him out. He spent countless hours after that trying to coax me out of my room, trying to explain himself through the door. He'd given up part way though, saying he'd much prefer to talk to me face to face, and instead he sat there, leaning against the door. I could tell, because I heard the gentle bump when he did and the door moved slightly inwards to my room. It didn't move out again for a long time after that. His head housekeeper, Shima, had suspected he'd done something wrong, and from what I could gather by the yelling and the pained yelps was that she was dragging him away by his ear or something.

Not long afterwards, Shima was back. Instead of knocking she just let herself in, and from what I could tell she had the master key in her hand before she slid it back into her pocket. She calmly walked over, and perched on the end of my bed, placing a tray down on my bedside table and pouring us both a cup of mint tea.

"Would you like to tell me your version of events?" she asked, and I looked up at her, taking in her calm demeanour before sighing and sitting up and shuffling over to the bed on the floor.

"I've had a terrible weekend," I started. "I was attacked by jealous girls, they shredded my clothing, and I had to borrow clothes off Kyouya so people thought I was sleeping with him."

"… Are you sleeping with him? Is that why Master Tamaki wants to talk to you?" she asked, raising one eyebrow.

"No!" I half screamed, standing upright with surprising energy. "No, I wouldn't sleep with anybody because I'm not that kind of girl! I have some self respect. Tamaki… I'm just confused."

"If he's done something that has offended you, then you should talk to him about it. If he hasn't, then there's no reason not to talk to him."

I considered that, absolutely stumped by what she'd said before I sighed and dropped my head into my hands. Shima sat quietly, sipping at her tea before sighing slightly and resting her hand on my head in a motherly fashion.

"I know you've gone through a lot these past few months, what with your family and all... but you need to keep moving forward. If there is something happening in your life that is adding stess and you can easily stop it, then do so. You don't need any added pressure."

I looked up at her, and her eyes seemed warm and welcoming, and oh so very wise.

"How do you know what to do?" I asked quietly, hiding the double meaning in there. I wanted to know how she could relate, without seeming rude, but I also wanted to know how I'd know what to do. She cleared her throat quietly and smiled bitterly.

"When I was growing up, I was engaged to a man who abused alcohol and abused me. I didn't want to be in that situation any more, so I left him. I understand what you're going through, and though you may not realise now, I understand what your mother did. She shouldn't have left you, but it was a final bid of desperation. Don't be angry with her when she comes back."

"If she comes back," I muttered, but Shima disregarded this.

"When the time comes, you'll know what to do. You are a fine young lady, and I'm glad master Tamaki is choosing good company. But you need to do what makes you feel most secure, don't let people upset you needlessly."

Shima stood up and walked to the door, turning around at the last minute and smiled slightly.

"Whatever he's said or done, he had the best intentions at heart."

With that she walked away, and I was left to drop to my bed,wondering what on Earth I should do.


	31. Chapter 31

Another chapter :) Not made many edits with this one for the simple reason that I couldn't be bothered. If there are typos, mistakes, whatever, just ignore them. I'm just too tired. But on the plus side my fatigue helps me write and I have been doing so! In the last hour I've written 2 chapters and they should be posted soon :D

Hope you enjoy, my pretties!

* * *

When I saw Haruhi being mobbed by three Lobelia girls the next day at school during culture club week, I knew there'd be trouble. Lobelia students were always trouble.

I knew this because my father tried to force me into the Lobelia academy a few years ago, thinking Ouran was a worse school. He came with me on the inset day, where they introduced me to some of the more upstanding students, the ones held high in societies' opinion.

In other words… the richest, most pompous brats they had.

Benibara Amakusa, whose face oft haunts my dreams, was one of the girls I had met that day, and the one who made my fathers' mind up that Ouran was a better school. I had to suffer ill hidden lesbian advances, as she poured compliments over me about my 'porcelain skin', 'striking eyes' and 'stark beauty', more than once leaning in and pecking my cheek. It was unnerving. It was harassment, bordering the sexual kind.

And now she was harassing Haruhi just across the hall, who was trying desperately hard to keep hold of a bag of coffee jars.

The largest part of me wanted to run away and hide in the toilets, but she'd already spotted me and swooped down like a falcon.

"Oh, my dear beautiful Hanna!" she cried, dropping to one knee before me and taking my hand. "You don't know how terribly my heart has broken to see such lovely specimens such as you and this young lady here in the slums of so called high class education!"

Haruhi gaped at me, obviously stuck into speechlessness and leaving me to try and talk our way into some sort of escape.

"Benibara-" I started.

"Benio," she gushed with a wide toothy smile, reminding me of a shark, standing up and towering above me.

"Benibara," I continued, ignoring the informal nickname she'd offered to me. "As terrible it is for me to know that, I'm afraid Haruhi and I must leave. We're going to the library to study."

I went to grab hold of Haruhi, when a slightly younger girl with long silky caramel coloured hair grabbed hold of my arm.

"We couldn't possibly let you go! We have to go and see the demons that are the Host Club and force them to set Haruhi free from her servitude!"

"Why do I have to go?" I muttered, feeling myself giving up already.

"Because you, being Haruhi's friend, must understand why she must be set free from this injustice! Must be allowed to spread her wings and fly from this hellish place!" screamed the youngest girl, with short bob styled hair. Her voice practically made my ears bleed.

So with that Haruhi and I allowed ourselves to be dragged around to the third music room, and while Banibara's minions burst through the doors, I managed to detach myself from them and sidle over to Tamaki.

The hosts, dressed in suits of armour that made me want to cling to each and every one of them, welcomed the three ladies, and Tamaki (obviously deeming himself the knight in shiniest armour) extended the greeting firther.

"Well, well, well! I see you ladies are from another school," he smiled, holding his sword high. "I certainly hope we haven't startled you, we love first time guests."

I watched on, feeling myself slipping into some vacancy within my inner mind as I wondered how long it would be until something was said that would make Tamaki sulk so I could grab him to talk. I watched as the general back and forth of Tamaki's usual charms and the girls' obvious arrogance continued, until Benibara finally made her appearance with Haruhi. I didn't bother listening, but when Tamaki was punched in the face and fled, I made my move. While the rest of the club were in shock at the fact that their 'king' had been assaulted, and these new women, I pulled the blond to one side.

He was obviously a bit distracted with the sudden presence of the girls of Lobelia, but I noticed his eyes twinkle ever so slightly though he shuffled his feet a bit.

"There's going to be a lot of drama… but do you think when it's over we can talk?"

"Yes, of course Hanna," he smiled, suddenly recovering from the shock, though a red mark was left on his jaw. He took a small step towards me, before Benibara grabbed him by his hair and yanked him back.

"How very dare you try to soil this young maidens purity before me!" she screamed, baring down on him while the others stood around not entirely sure what to do. I stepped forward and shoved her roughly, and her shock made her let go of Tamaki who righted himself and glared at her.

"Leave him alone!" I shouted, but when she gave me the most evil glare I felt some of my previous confidence recoil. Luckily, Tamaki stepped in so I didn't have to say anything else.

"Hanna is a friend of mine, and I have no intentions what so ever to 'spoil her purity'. You don't have to take such extreme and violent measures to try and prevent something that won't happen."

His chest was puffed out, he was staring Benibara right in the eye, and I felt myself swoon slightly. Obviously, and much to my shame and embarrassment, this did not go unnoticed by the other two girls who traipsed around after Benibara.

"Look at the way she swoons over him!" the girl with long hair shrieked, making me flush red and avert my eyes, staring fixedly at my shoes.

"And now she can't bare to look at him. What a pathetic excuse for a woman," the youngest girl chided and I could almost hear her smirk. "If she really felt anything for him then she wouldn't be so shamed at the idea admiring him… though can you blame her, he's a halfer."

"And to think they're dragging these sweet young girls down with them," Benibara moaned, before turning with renewed venom in her tone. "The Host Clubs' president may be a pretty little halfer! But he shouldn't be using his looks to create a fictitious romance! Attempting to fool the hearts of pure young maidens is demeaning! Your so called 'club activities' are nothing more than debasing macho fantasies!"

The three Lobelia girls started tittering between themselves, and Tamaki turned red. I knew of his parentage, everybody talked about it when he first came to Ouran. People were initially very judgemental which I'd thought very unfair, and all because Tamaki was the result of a love affair.

I'd thought it was romantic the way his parents had found love, and perhaps it wasn't the most desirable circumstance, but so what? Just because his mother and father had an affair doesn't make him any less of a person. I was about to speak up, but the caramel haired girl grabbed hold of me, clutching me close to her, and Benibara grabbed Haurhi and did the same.

"Now we know what goes on here, we can't allow these maidens to stay! You've obviously corrupted poor Hanna, and we need to rescue her before she is too far gone! We'll prepare the paperwork and have them transferred to Lobelia at once. And we'll welcome them into the Zuka club."

I pried myself away from the girl, smiling shyly but stepping back out of arms reach, while Haruhi spoke up about them jumping to conclusions (where she was corrected and told that all of Benibara's 'assumptions' about Tamaki were indeed fact) and that she might not even want to leave. I quietly slipped away, leaving the ten of them to whatever devices they may get up to.

I was half way down the corridor when the three Lobelia dimwits pranced past, and just moments afterwards Haruhi stormed after them. I shrugged, and made my way outside to a car which would take me back to Tamaki's house.

* * *

Thanks for reading, now please, please review :)

Tatty Bye!


	32. Chapter 32

Another chapter :)

And guys! I have a poll up on my profile, which I'd like people to vote on if they find it of any relevance. I have a fanfic on Ouran called 'Life Across Waters' which I wrote ages ago and looking back on it I think it's utter balls. I've considered rewriting it but obviously if the readers like it then it'd be better left as is, right? I don't wanna fix somethign that ain't broken. So please, if you know what I'm going on about then go for it, if not but you're interested then find LAW and skip through a few chapters and whatever you think, go for the poll.

Thanks! And please review!

* * *

I'd been in my room for half an hour before I heard the front door slam, indicating Tamaki was home, and loud quick footsteps coming up the stairs and down the corridor to my door.

I listened as he paused, and there was a short rap on the door before he let himself in.

"Hanna, you said you'd like to talk?" he said quietly, his violet eyes large and happy, a smile plastered on his. I would have answered and started a conversation, but I saw he was holding a large red dress and I couldn't get the words out. He noticed I was looking at the bundle in his arms and he started to chuckle.

"This is something for club the twins and I came up with… in retrospect it's a bit of a stupid idea."

"I bet it's not," I said, smiling for the first time since he'd come home and sitting up properly. Though it probably was, I knew from years of being a host club patron that Tamaki tended to get a bit carried away with silly ideas.

"Anyway, you wanted to talk," he said, laying the dress down over a chair and sitting next to me on my bed.

"Yeah," I replied, suddenly nervous as I swept my hair back behind my ears while struggling to maintain eye contact.

"Is this about me trying to kiss you?" he whispered, and I snapped my eyes up to see he'd turned deathly white, and looked very nervous. My heart clenched slightly, I felt bad for pulling away like I had when he'd tried to kiss me, but I had no idea what was going on.

"No," I whispered, shaking my head, and a small part of me broke when he looked relieved, but I don't think he noticed. I gathered myself up and carried on, forcing a small smile "No, I was wondering when your grandmother was next free so I could meet her."

"Ah," he muttered, but smiled warmly "We can go to my father tomorrow and ask him," he suggested, and I nodded in reply.

We were quiet for a moment, and he bit his lip and looked away, and I thought to myself that I could cut the tension in this room with a knife… then I heard him taking a deep breath and he hung his head.

"I'm sorry Hanna."

"What for?" I asked, perplexed.

"For taking advantage of you, at the beach. I should have thought that you would have been upset from those girls being horrible to you, and your father coming to see you," the corner of his mouth pulled downwards at the mention of my father, like he had a bad taste in his mouth. "And I put the extra pressure on you by saying my grandmother wanted to meet you."

"Don't worry about it Tamaki," I said gently, leaning forward and placing my hand over his. "Now… tell me about this plan of yours."

* * *

I had a hard time trying to sleep that night, wondering why he'd tried to kiss me in the first place, why he'd apologised for it, and why he seemed so sheepish around me sometimes. During club hours he would bound around and treat me with the same gusto he treated every other girl with, but in private… in my room, when he was helping me in math, when my world fell apart after my mother left and father was taken into custody, he's always been so gentle, and caring.

Part of me wanted to cry, simply because whenever he was close I felt my stomach knot, my heart would pound faster than should be healthy, and I couldn't have him, because he's a host. I'd be hated by everyone, and if being bullied by four or five girls was bad then I couldn't bare to imagine what would happen if his entire guest list had a vendetta against me…

I had a crush on him, and I knew I had done for years but I'd chalked it down to being a guest that was obsessed with the hosts. But now with Tamaki being so nice to me, caring for me and even perhaps showing that he had some small emotional bond with me, I knew what it was, and I knew I wanted it more than anything… and I knew I couldn't have it.


	33. Chapter 33

So, yeah. I'm a bit depressed because today I found out a relative has cancer. It's bummed me out, but because in the past I've seen more than my fair share of family deaths I'm kind of used to it. She might not die either, so chin up people!

One of my lesser problems is that tomorrow my boyfriend is forcing me to go watch the football match between Bolton and Blackpool. Not only are his home team (Bolton) utter shyte, but Blackpool hates Bolton and there's a possibility a fight or something will break out. Lovely.

Also, tonight I am supposed to be packing my bags because in a megre two days I'll be ferrying off to Belfast! To work. And be away from Fanfiction for a month and a half... ugh.

Sorry I've not posted in forever, I've been Fable-d up.

* * *

All the staff were in shock when Tamaki walked into the dining room the next morning dressed as a woman, wearing the large red frock, makeup plastered on and long blond extensions in his hair. I stared for a moment too until I remembered that Tamaki was about as strange as they came, and this was about normal.

He was riffling through the post, putting letters on the side that were addressed to the live in staff, putting a postcard aside addressed to him with a sad, tender look on his face, then handing two letters to me. One in a very official looking envelope, with the return address to the Tokyo City Justice Department, which made my stomach drop, then the other had the familiar cursive scrawl I was all to familiar with, and wherever my stomach had dropped to, it now went 20,000 leagues under the dining table. Tamaki must have seen the look on my face, because he put aside his postcard, though somewhat reluctantly, and came to stand next to me.

"Are you ok Hanna?" he asked quietly, looking over my shoulder to the letters I had clutched in my hand. He wasted no time in pulling up a chair next to me, and saying in his gentlest, most caring voice he offered to look through the letters for me. Only if I wanted him to that is.

"Please," I choked, and he took the Justice Department letter from me and quickly tore it open, scanning through it before pulling a face.

"Your fathers trial is in two months, they're trying him on accounts of assault and GBH, and he'll be sentenced to five years imprisonment if he pleads guilty, fifteen if he pleads otherwise and is found to be guilty."

"He'll plead guilty," I muttered, wanting to shove myself into my bow of cornflakes and drown in the milk.

"He might well do, but they want you to stand as witness and victim."

"I don't want to," I whispered, by throat catching my breath and making me hiccup. Tamaki didn't have to say anything, but the look he gave me told me it would be best to. I looked wearily at the other letter, knowing it was from my mother before I even touched it, biting my lip as Tamaki extended his hand to pick it up.

"Don't," I said quickly, brushing the tears that had welled up in my eyes away. "I don't want to know right now."

He didn't reply, just pulled me close and embraced me, nuzzling his face into my hair and whispering sweet things to try and cheer me up. I felt his lips brush against my cheek as he pulled away, and I flushed red, looking at him with my eyes open wide.

"We'd better get to school," he said, to which I nodded, agreeing, though I wanted to sit here and look at him, look past the terrible makeup and the long hair. I wanted to know what was going on in that mind of his… but he was already up and walking out the kitchen, waving cheerily to Shima who was stood in the doorway clutching her chest.

I followed slowly, pausing only momentarily at the front door to turn to one of the maids and ask if I could lend her bobble, which she happily handed over and smiled at me.

I scraped my hair up into a ponytail on my way to the car, and when I climbed in next to Tamaki he beamed at me.

* * *

I spent the majority of the day in the principles office, talking to him about how best to approach his mother and Tamaki's grandmother. He informed me that she didn't always take kindly to people who's lives were somewhat dysfunctional, but if I was polite and wouldn't show that I was offended, I'd probably squeeze my way into her good books.

It was all slightly unnerving, and very peculiar. I literally had to go through this massive procedure to allow me to live in Tamaki's house, and if I failed than I would either have to move in with someone else and mess up their routine, or go back to an empty shell of a home… I wanted neither. I wanted to stay here with Tamaki and Shima and all the wonderful servants that treated me as part of the family.

I was told that I could meet with Shizuo Suoh, the Suoh company matriarch, in a weeks time, and that I should be presentable and act with the utmost respect for her. Something I found myself feeling I would have trouble doing since I knew how harshly she treated Tamaki. But I agreed, and shook hands with Yuzuru with the promise that I would behave myself as best I could.

It was when I was walking down the stairs to go for lunch that I had the biggest shock of the day, watching Benibara and her minions' storm past, trying to maintain an air of dignity, but failing miserably to do so. Benibara must have seen me from the corner of her eye, because she turned sharply on her heel, hands on hips and practically barked at me.

"So what are your plans then? Are you going to stay in this hellish hole, or are you coming to Lobelia?"

I shrugged my shoulders slightly, not feeling all too bothered about their presence and replied honestly.

"I'm staying here, and I'm also planning on making a good impression on Tamaki's grandmother so hopefully I can live with him."

I turned and strode away then, though I looked back over my shoulder to see them all looking dumbstruck. I rounded the corner and I felt my lip tremble, and something giddy bubble up inside me, and I burst out laughing, and kept laughing.

Then someone ploughed into me, and I fell over, still laughing.

"Hanna, you nut, what's so funny?" Katia asked, straddling my waist and staring down at me, a quizzical look on her face.

"I just- I just told a group of les- haha – lesbians that I live with Tam-Tamaki," I wheezed, shoving her off while I caught my breath and clawed my way up her body to stand up, pulling myself up by the hem of her dress and her shoulders to stand again.

"Lesbians?" she asked, stunned, and when I nodded grinning she burst out laughing which set me off again.

We ended up sat on the floor, leaning against the wall. Katia lay down with her head in my lap and I stroked her hair and told her all about what had been happening, how I had been feeling and how things were going with Tamaki and his family.

"Kat, how do you know if you like someone?" I asked quietly, and she looked up.

"Who do you think you like?" she asked, but the small grin on her face told me she knew. I didn't have to say a word before she sat up and sighed.

"Hanna, do you love him, or do you love what he's doing for you?".

"I... I don't understand," I muttered, feeling my cheeks blaze red and embarrassment was creeping it's way into my voice.

"Well, Tamaki Suoh is undeniably gorgeous, very kind and is very intelligent. However, with everything that's going on in your life – your mother leaving and your father going to prison and all that – it could be possible you're latching onto anyone who treats you with the slightest bit of kindness... particularly someone who is male, as you haven't had a good male presence in your life recently."

I sat stumped for a moment, before looking up at Kat and sighing.

"Dunno when you became a psychologist, but I don't think that's... I mean there's more than just... you have a point..."

Tamaki treated me ever so well, but I was just probably clinging to him since he was being so kind. Hadn't I done that just a few months ago? He could say one simple line to me that he used on every other girl in the room '_your smile alone brightens my day_'...

What a lie. I felt tears spring to my eyes, and I turned away from Katia, somewhat furious. Not with her, but with myself for not noticing this blatant truth that was dangling before me for months. I wanted so badly to believe that Tamaki was wonderful, and that there was some hope for men, but his every kind word, his every nice action was probably something he used on another dozen girls. I felt anger and upset swell in my stomach, and I hiccuped slightly in frustration.

Maybe I had felt like he was something special, and I probably do have a special place in my heart for him, and yes. Him letting me stay with him in my hour of need was a particularly kind act, but everything else he'd done; leaning in for kisses but leaving you hanging on a breath, whispering sweet nothings, holding you when you cry and making you smile with his dashing presence, his caring attitude, his gentle tone...

He did it every day to a host of women who swooned over every action, and just when I'd pulled myself away from that mesmerising grip and begun living my own life and bettering myself personally I'd had the misfortune to have a severely dysfunctional family, and I'd fled into the warm arms of someone who'd been there for all those soppy moments, someone who knew just how to treat a damsel in distress.

I'd tricked myself into believing that he could love me, when in reality I was just a silly host club patron, there for them to make money from.

I felt tears pooling in my eyes and running down my cheeks as I came to two terrible conclusions.

Tamaki Suoh was a womanising cad.

And I had just started a period.


	34. Chapter 34

Hey all... I've actually totally been trying to forget about this fic :/ I'm struggling to write it and I have been fangasming over other things (Fable, Rise of the Guardians, so on) so yeah, I'm sorry...

So this is going on HIATUS now for a small while. Which is sad, because I used to be so good at writing for Ouran.

As for Avo, hunni I'm SO far into my Fable fic now it's unreal XD check out my profile, it's called Balverine Child. Hope you love it x

* * *

We'd watched the film together, quiet and deep in thought. I could feel Tamaki wrap his arm around me, trying to be discrete but failing miserably at doing so. I could only smile slightly and nuzzle my face into his chest as that arm tightened around me and his other free hand clasped mine. He sighed contentedly and I could almost feel his smile beaming from him. I slowly started to forget why I had been so upset with him, or why I'd wanted to leave. I slipped into a completely defenceless state so when Bridget was chasing her Mr Darcy through the snow in her underwear I didn't expect Tamaki to pull me up into his lap. Nor did I expect him to look deeply into my eyes, his a shimmering purple, boring into my own plain green ones.

I especially didn't think he'd have whispered into my ear, "I think I love you."

And there was no way I'd have known I'd miss the kiss on screen when I'd first put the DVD in, as I'd be otherwise busy kissing Tamaki on my bed, in my room.

I woke up feeling tired and groggy, my stomach bloated because of all the junk food I'd had the night before. My mind for some reason was trying to throw me into a panic, screaming at me to get up as quickly as possible and run, though I couldn't for the life of me figure out why I seemed to be adopting this flight reaction. My body protested movement, but allowed me to stretch my arms and legs.

Or at least let me try to stretch, as when I shifted ever so slightly I felt an arm tighten around my waist and someone nuzzle their face into my hair at the back of my neck.

It was then I realised why my mind wanted me to move so much, and my body lurched forward, a small shriek emitting from my mouth as I launched myself away from Tamaki, who awoke with a start and dived right after me, clamping his hand over my mouth to muffle the screams.

"Hanna! Hanna be quiet!" he hissed, panic over his face and it wasn't until I heard the quick rapping on my door that I understood why.

"Miss Konni, are you okay?!" one of the maids cried, sounding ever so concerned.

"Hannah please," Tamaki hissed, his expression pleading and anxious. I carefully composed myself, caught my breath and pried his hands away from my mouth.

"I- I'm fine. A bad dream I guess," I called, looking deep into Tamaki's eyes and sighing slightly, trying to calm my pounding heart.

"If you're sure miss... would you like me to fetch anyone?" she asked from outside the door.

I looked up, breaking that contact and called back, "no it's okay, but thank you."

We listened as she left, and when we were sure it was safe Tamaki pushed me back gently and lay down with me on the plush carpet. We were silent, and I dared not make a sound, holding baited breath. His arm snaked over my stomach, pulling me flush against him, and I let out a small gasp, my chest heaving as I let myself breath again, my cheeks flushing as the rumble of Tamaki chuckling sounded in my ear.

"A bad dream?" he asked, his lips brushing oh so gently against my cheek. I turned my head slowly, looking at him. His golden hair had fallen into his face, his eyes half covered by his bangs but I could see them twinkling mischievously under the soft wisps, his mouth turned up in a smirk.

"What would you rather I have said? That I had the young master of the house in my bed last night?" I teased, smirking back at him.

He laughed again, a little louder, "no, that wouldn't have done, would it?" Then his expression melted from joyous to somewhat sombre, serious.

"We can't let anyone know about this," he whispered, his voice dropping so low I had to strain to hear him even so close to him. "People can't know about us?"

"Us?" I asked, my heart skipping a beat before deciding to make up for it by pounding rapidly against my ribcage. I thought it would leap out and I would die, and part of me wanted it to, scared for what he might say next but oddly, dangerously intrigued.

"I... Hanna I feel something for you," he admitted, his hand coming up and cupping my cheek. "But until we know what my grandmother makes of this living situation I can't act on anything publicly. I'm sorry."

"You're being oddly serious," I muttered, completely disregarding what he'd said because I couldn't let myself believe it. Tamaki Suoh, the object of my affections for the last few years, could not have exclusive feelings for me. He just couldn't.

"It's not really a laughing matter," he pointed out, but there was an ironic hint of a chuckle there. I smiled too, until he kissed me firmly on the lips, his arms wrapping tightly around me and holding me flush against his body. After a moment, where I'd just allowed my eyelids to flutter shut and my body to relax into the embrace, he pulled away, "I need to go now..."

"Okay," I whispered, letting him go, rolling over onto the carpet and sighing.

I began to think I'd let myself in for a world of confusion.

* * *

I'd allowed Katia to drag me to club, and my stomach plummeted when I saw nobody there, only the five guys and Haruhi looking very, very serious. Katia seemed to be in on whatever it was because she whispered a small sorry to me before making her way over to the couch and sitting on it slowly, looking sheepish and sorry for herself.

"Um... what's-?" I started, but Tamaki stood forward with a sudden look of panic on his face and he explained what was happening, sounding very formal... as if he'd revised his words.

"Hanna, my grandmother had a sudden meeting to get to in America, so she said that – unfortunately – she'd have to push up the date for meeting you..."

I felt my stomach drop as he spoke and all the colour in my face seemed to seep away, leaving me what I could imagine to be a deathlier white than ever before. I was trembling as he led me to a side room and escorted me through a door, smoothing my dress out for me discreetly while whispering for me to be myself and not be scared and to be as polite as possible.

He might as well have been whispering the sum of pi to the hundredth decimal place to me because after about four seconds I lost track of what he was saying. I found myself being sat before an elderly woman with a tight, drawn and extremely stern facial expression. She was dressed in the most expensive silk kimono I'd ever seen, the colours interweaving so delicately that it all seemed to shimmer before me. Her hair was drawn back into a tight bun and her lips were so thin it was like she didn't have any. I found out she was pursing them because she took a breath and nodded to the chair opposite her.

I sat down, and we studied one another. I could tell that for her age she was quite beautiful, and must have been stunning in her youth. She still held an air of grace about her, but then there was an icy feel too, foreboding and terrible.

"Miss Konni, I have been made aware of your living arrangement with my grandson," she started, and my stomach plummeted as part of me jumped to the conclusion that she'd made a snap decision about me, and was about to tell me to clear out. However, she went on, "I would like to ask you a few questions... but firstly, perhaps my son could leave the room and escort our audience out."

I turned then in time to see Mr Suoh jump slightly at the mention of his name, and I was surprised because I'd not noticed him before that point. What surprised me further was the fact that Tamaki had been stood there looking shell shocked and the other hosts had the cheek to stick their heads through to listen and expect not to be noticed.

"Well that's rude," I muttered, forgetting myself for a moment, then remembering where I was and who I was with and snapping my head back around so quickly I think I gave myself whiplash.

"It is slightly," Mrs Suoh said, and I was surprised (pleasantly) to see a very small smile creep across her lips.

There was silence, as she reached out and took hold of a cup of tea, sipping from it. When she placed it down upon the saucer again with the smallest chinking sound she looked up at me, her eyes piercing mine.

"What relationship do you have with my grandson?" she asked, and before I could even part my lips to speak, she added with a sudden stern look- "Honestly."

"I-" I couldn't think, and I felt absolutely floored, feeling my chances of staying at the Suoh residence slipping away like sand between my fingers. "I honestly... don't know..." I finished, realising how weak I sounded.

She only raised an eyebrow at me, but she didn't say a word, he expression seeming to ice over again, the small smile faded from her face quickly.

"I mean, he's been a very good friend these past few months," I hurried, feeling panic grip my throat and compress my chest. "And I've been able to speak to him openly about my mother leaving and my father's abuse, he's become somewhat of a confidant to me."

"And you trust him?" She barked, and I pushed myself back into the cushions, feeling threatened.

"Of course I do!" I cried, my voice raising with each syllable I spoke, tears threatening but not arriving yet.

"And he's a friend of yours?" she asked again, her voice still steely and cruel.

"He has been for years," I said, my voice quavering and the tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.

"And you love him?" she asked suddenly, sweeping me off my feet and I was answering before I could even think what to say.

"Yes."

The words escaped my lips before I could stop it, and I clapped a hand over my mouth in shock and horror. That was all she needed to hear apparently, as she stood suddenly, her slender figure seemingly towering over me, and she looked down her nose with fire in her eyes.

"Yuzuru!" she shouted, and in seconds her son and the chairman was stood in the room, looking very hesitant. "This girl should be moved out of the second Suoh residence by the end of the month. She's is a threat to your son becoming the heir of the Suoh company."

And with that she left, leaving me tearful on the sofa while she swept past the others, who all looked equally hurt and shocked, besides Kyouya who kept a straight face and Tamaki who seemed the most crestfallen of them all. Yuzuru was beside me though before I could register it, and he was pulling me into a hug like I'd never had before; a fatherly love seemed to aminate from him and it was something unfamiliar and strange but then and there I found myself craving it and I buried my face into his chest and sobbed while he stroked my hair trying to hush me.

"I messed up," I choked, wiping my face furiously with my sleeve, realising how unattractive and pitiful it would have looked. "I messed up, and I didn't mean to..."

"Hush now, Hanna," he whispered, but I didn't stop and he could only pull me in tighter and rock me gently while the others watched on with sorrow in their eyes.

"But I messed up... I messed up."


End file.
